Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Darth Artemis, Oct 27, 2010.
Indeed, I'm waiting for more of the fic. A Guardsman In Tristain; simply awesome.
Thanks, but the Ultra was trying to talk to Colbert, not Six. Six was thinking to himself at the very start and only properly Dynamic Entry'd near the end.
Agreed. I did not really think of how to advance beyond this point, though.
I was left wanting for an expression that would put the idea of assassination across. Do you think a direct use of the term "assassin" would have been better?
I totally did not notice I had hit 117. Next target 312?
Nononono. I mean how the Elite heard one of the students say "Noble" and instantly spazzed out thinking they were referring to the hyper lethal death machine on legs that had been murdering his buddies just moments ago.
Honestly? Yeah. That's pretty much what the first word someone from a Pseudo medieval culture would use to describe someone they recognized as a professional killer (which Colbert probably DOES have the experience to recognize by eye contact). Words like "wet works" are used in the context of modern society, where people are familiar with the modern specialized terminology/linguistics related to modern special/unconventional paramilitary forces.
Hehehe, CSI Tristan style.
You know, it occurs to me that the mage healer working on Six might catch some interesting aspects of his physiology while healing him. Like with Six's deeper wounds, the muscle tissue takes 2-3 times as long to heal up. Then they remember how much heavier than normal six was out of his suit, and at least some of the teacher staff realize they have an individual with hyper muscle density.
Though I realized that with Halo weapons, a certain little factoid that happened in the series wouldn't work. So I decided to play around with it.
"Tabitha, Pass that to me!" Louise shouted, gesturing to the *Staff of destruction*
Tabitha nodded, and handed the strange object to the Strawberry Blonde girl. It was like nothing she'd ever seen before, and actually holding it rather unwieldy, but with her skill in magic it was all she could rely on.
"Now levitate me down there" she ordered as she leapt from Sylphid, Tabitha's dragon familiar, cradling the over sized weapon in her arms.
On the ground, Noble Six continued to agilely sprint, roll and leap out of the way of the Ponderous Golems attacks. But even with his inhuman strength, enhanced further by his Mjolnir armor, there was little he could do against an animated mountain of stone. And the one offensive weapon he had on him had failed.
He shifted broken Germanian sword in his hands by the hilt. In truth, he hadn't thought to much of the extravagantly expensive gift from Kirche. Compared to the mass produced titanium blades and rifles he grew up using, it seemed almost a toy. The only reason he had taken it into battle with him over Derf, the talking sword Louise had purchased for him, was the blatant state of decay the blade had been in.
Six considered his options. There was one thing he could do that might damage the golem, but it required him taking a hit. And even then it would only inflict localized damage and the intelligently controlled monstrosity was unlikely to repeat the same mistake twice. Six cursed under his breath.
If only I had something work with here. Anything in fact! What I'd give to have a ...
Six's attention was diverted by Louise's landing. He'd have been irritated, if he hadn't seen what she was holding. Instantly, a mind forged by over a decade of war and training acted on impulse as Six made a mad dash towards Louise.
Louise was frantically waving the staff of destruction to no avail. "Is this thing really a magical staff?" She shouted in desperation.
She noted the towering Spartan approaching her at breakneck speed, kicking rock and debris as he suddenly brought his hefty armor to a stop right in front of her.
"I don't know how to use this!" Louise shouted in desperation as the Spartan pulled it from her grasp.
Without a word in response, six dropped the Staff onto his shoulders. Holding it steady with one hand, the other practically danced across the device, arming it.
"Don't stand behind me! Back blast" Six shouted as he held the Staff steady by the handles.
Louise hurriedly moved out of the way.
Six aimed dead center mass at the oncoming Golem and activated the firing mechanism.
The staff whooshed, and the double tubes cranked automatically as a burning projectile zoomed out of the staff at high speed towards the Golem.
Six tossed aside the Staff the instant after he fired and with incredible speed not capable of mortal men, leaped in front of Louise, shielding her slender unprotected frame with his armored bulk.
The 102mm rocket impacted against the Golem with a deafening blast, violently sending a shower of debris in all directions.
When the smoke cleared only the lower half of the golem still stood, the top having been blown off completely. The golems remains slowly began to crumble into dirt.
Six stood fast in front of his master, catching countless chunks of rocks that harmlessly bounced off his flickering plasma shields. He waited until the last large chunks of debris has fallen, before relaxing to turn towards Louise.
"Are you alright?" Six inquired, as he knelt down and offered a hand to his master, his usual calm tone betraying a slight hint of concern.
"y-yes. I'm fine" Louise stuttered in response, awed by the explosion, as Six's hand enveloped hers and pulled her up. His grip was tender, but held like a vice. Louise shivered.
Sylphid, carrying both Tabitha and Kirche descended. Tabitha remained perched on her mount, as Kirche jumped off and went off at a run towards Six and Louise.
Six turned over to the discarded staff in the distance.
"Why is something like this..." he train of thought was interrupted when the buxom red head threw herself into his side.
"Darling! You did it! I can't believe you knew how to use that thing" Kirche purred as she pressed herself tightly into Six's side.
Kirche's relatively slight weight did little to disrupt Six's stance, but it was distracting none the less when he wanted to examine the Staff of Destruction.
Six's motion tracked blipped and he turned to his 9 o'clock. "...Miss Longueville" Tabitha and Noble six noted simultaneously.
Miss Longueville had made her reappearance, picking up the staff of destruction then widening the gap between her and the group then said, "Great Job people!"
She removed her glasses, her one gentle expression turning to a ruthless one filled with killing intent that shocked all but two members of the group.
"Miss Longueville? What are you doing?" Kirche exlaimed when Longueville turned the weapon on the group, holding it in her shoulders just like Six had.
"I was the one controlling the Golem all along you see" she explained with an evil grin. "I am Fouquet the Crumbling Dirt!"
Tabitha began to subtly wave her wand and chant under her breadth.
"All of you don't move! I have the staff of Destruction pointed towards you, and it just destroyed my Golem in one shot. Drop your wands!" She shouted, waved the weapon across the party, who had no choice but to comply, rendering them powerless.
"I'll admit, I had expected a group of teachers to come, rather than students. But it all worked out nicely, don't you think?"
"What worked out?" Louise angrily demanded.
"Figuring out how the Staff of Destruction worked. I'll admit I was completely baffled to its operation until Mister Familiar here so kindly demonstrated on my Golem. If I didn't know that, it wouldn't be much better than decoration."
She looked glanced over the party one more time "Even though our time together was short, it was quite enjoyable. Au revoir"
Feeling helpless, the girls cringed and closed their eyes.
Unflinching Six took a long step forward, standing his towering armored frame to its full height in excess of three mail.
Fouquet aimed the Staff right at Six's stomach. "You're pretty brave, aren't you?"
"Bravery has nothing to do with it at all"
Fouquet pressed the trigger, as like before a fiery projectile whooshed out of the cranking mechanical tubes. Before the girls senses had processed the terrible sound, the Spartan was moving.
Six began the motion of dropping to one knee and bringing a fist to the ground. The rocket was upon him before he had finished the motion, but by then a strange pulsating aura of energy wrapped around Six's entire body.
The missile, which was about to strike the armored warrior right in his helmet, suddenly was blown back in the opposite direction, flying back towards Fouquet and barely missing her, impacting 30 mail behind her, close enough for her to be showered with some of the blasts debris.
Fouquet leaped to the side after the fact, and used her cape as a shield against rock fragments. Her face was white with shock. "W-what? How did you..." she stuttered.
Six had only kept his strange pose for but a fraction of a second and had broken it as soon as the missile was deflected.
The strange Aurora disappeared when he stood back upright and began to calmly advance towards Fouquet.
"Y-you bastard!" The renowned thief cursed, swinging the Staff back towards the advancing Spartan and pulling the trigger.
*click click click* there was no reaction.
"Huh? why won't it fire?" Fouquet pressed the firing mechanism over and over to no avail.
Like lightening, Six dashed forward as Fouquet was distracted, delivering a controlled strike to her solar plexus.
"The M41 only has two shots" Six noted dryly noted as Fouquet collapsed to the ground, pulling the rocket from her as she fell.
Six turned towards the shocked trio. "Fouquet has been neutralized and the package is secure."
"Darling! That was incredible" Kirche gushed as her face flushed at the Spartans display of Martial prowse.
Even the normally aloof Tabitha seemed rather amazed.
"N-now just wait a minute!" Louise exclaimed, waving her arms about in confusion. "How did you do that? That first shot completely pulverized that Golem! How could you have..." she recalled the strange Aura that had surrounded her Familiar. "Y-you said that you couldn't do magic!"
"That wasn't magic." Six stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "That was science".
*I'm a bit confused on how long a mail is actually. Based on Fouquet describing the M72 as being a mail long folded up, I'm guessing it's about .66 meters. Can anybody confirm this, or give me the exact measurement?
Will I ever witness a fanfic where a crazy scientist is summoned? And I don't mean your normal, run of the mill crazy "zombie supersoldier virus" scientist. I mean crazy, batshit insane "BEHOLD MY PLASMA SHOOTING WALKING AIRCAFT CARRIER MECHAZAURUS REX THE THIRD!" scientist. A man dedicated not to science, but SCIENCE!
Mythbusters. Louise summons the Mythbusters.
An alternative to Familiar Laharl: Familiar Mao. And not Henrietta's familiar, as he had been previously. :drevil:
A girl genius spark?
Or perhaps a Motie engineer.
Would be ironic to have an engineer Gandalfr. It has unparalleled capacity to use any weapon...but it has no fighting instincts at all.
Ah well. It'll probably compensate by building a combat suit for Louise.
Let her summon Daria! Hm...need I explain it?
Deadpan Snarker who mocks stupidty and has an IQ and knowledge base that would be considered Genius by the Local Standards. Also likely to piss off the locals very quickly due to her inability NOT to mock stupidity.
Hm, what if Louise failed so hard, she was the one who traveled through the portal?
To wherever, I suppose, but for some macabre reason I was thinking S.T.A.L.K.E.R.-verse when I typed this.
Hopefully near a place where someone (who won't kill/eat her) can find her before any mutants/zombies/random anomalies get her.
And she inhabits the body of a certain God-Emperor...
The Breaking Of thread is thataway.
I'm writing a S.T.A.L.K.E.R. fic right now.
Only about 10k words so far, and I want at least 25k before I post it for review.
Hell, the Stalkers haven't even crossed over yet.
Louise summons Spiderman.
Has that been suggested?
If it has or has not, why should we care if that is the total length of effort (I.E. three words) you'll put into the suggestion?
Let me just say that this is very interesting and I am interestedly interested.
Just to let you know, I think that I'd either get annoyed, skip sections, or drop the fic if it takes 10k or more words to reach the crossover part.
You might want to revise the prologue to shorten it, 'get to the meat' quickly. Show the backstory in flashbacks and such occasionally, if you must.
You are a lying liar who lies.
So how many ideas have gotten more than four/five responses so far? Off the top of my head from what I can remember, there's the Shoggoth ideas, the Phyrexian idea, the Pokemon (Teamrocket) ideas, the Link ideas (and I NEED to PM Dan, :argh: ), the Halo ideas, and the Final Fantasy VI ideas. What others idea topics have I missed here?
There's a thread for that, more or less, though it also has Louise become the familiar of the person she sends herself to.
There was a decent discussion going on a while back about summoning the primary cast from the Black Lagoon, possibly with their boat as well, back on page 151: http://forums.spacebattles.com/showthread.php?p=5453111
Laharl's gotten some discussion going, as has Masane from the Witchblade anime.
Thank you guys. I knew I was missing something obvious. Were there any other ideas that got a lot of talk going on further back in the thread that you can remember?
Louise summons the legendary Kururugi Spinzaku.
It'd be a post-Zero Requiem summon, so you get someone who's just liberated a world from imperialistic oppression only to find himself in another world that's entirely based on Darwinistic ideals, bound in a contract with another Zero.
I want to write about Masane but I haven't watched the series since forever.
Separate names with a comma.