Imperfect Metamorphosis

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Robo Jesus, May 31, 2011.

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  1. Robo Jesus Your Mechanical Messiah

    After some thought, I decided to make a thread for the Touhou story Imperfect Metamorphosis.

    This story caught my attention not too long after it was posted, and has kept it since. At currently 28 chapter and 373,363 words, this is not a small read by any measure, but it is one I recommend wholeheartedly nonetheless. What begins with the start of spring soon [spoiler]develops into a series of misunderstandings and life and death confrontations as mistakes from the past are dregged up from where they were buried, from Rumia's secret past to Eientei's dark experiments on Rin Satsuki[/spoiler], along with the conflicts brewing [spoiler]in the ranks of those supposedly trying to fix this mess[/spoiler]. The series spirals from one disaster into the next, each as emotionally captivating as the last. The characters in the story quickly become fleshed out beings you can relate and empathize with. The most impressive thing here is despite how dark it can and is getting, there still remains an undercurrent of hope. It may not have a "Happily Ever After" ending, but even with everything that is going on, it isn't automatically set up as a "Bad End" story.

    So yeah, to say I'm impressed with this story is an understatement. It has two sidestories that are worth reading. The first being A Very Nineball Christmas, which while touching and adorable, doesn't have any real impact on the main story itself. The second is IM: Rhapsody of Subconscious Desire, which does have some bearing on the main story [spoiler]the interactions of Kaguya, Mokou, and the Shadow Youkai in Rin's mind[/spoiler].

    So, since this thread is about updates and discussion of the story, why not start it off with some talk of the latest chapter (28). With [spoiler]Yuuka having lost her little confrontation with Yukari, Marisa, Mima, Yuyuko, Youmu, Flandre, Remilia, Sakuya, Satori, Utsuho, and Rin due to them[/spoiler] cheating, I get the feeling [spoiler]Yuuka has decided to cheat a bit herself, and the guest in the start of the chapter is actually Maribel. Why her? If you're willing to go to the lengths Yukari is to protect Gensokyo, wouldn't it make sense to have another Border Youkai around incase something was to happen to her? I don't think anything would ever have come of it, and Maribel would have remained Human unless Yukari was to die, or Yuuka was to cheat herself[/spoiler].:D:drevil:
  2. biigoh Hmmmm?

    My self I have to wonder how bad that fight went given that she has two of the four gems; lavender and crimson. And also who got stuffed in them, and if they should be considered the "lucky ones".
  3. When half your post has to be spoiler-ed, fandom tags are appreciated.
  4. Honestly, I still hope this Eirin dies in a fire.
  5. Robo Jesus Your Mechanical Messiah

    Noted, and edited.:D
  6. biigoh Hmmmm?

    Personally, Yuyuko was kind of a bit extreme when you think of what she did to Mystia.
  7. The worst bit is that she doesn't remember any of it. When you annoy IM Yuuka over that, you know you fucked up.
  8. Robo Jesus Your Mechanical Messiah

    What's funny is Eirin knows how badly she fucked up, and back in chapter 5, felt it to be almost Karmic Justice that Rin was about to kill her.


    Youkai are much harder to kill in this story. Even if you kill them, the majority of them can come back with enough time and/or power (as explained in chapter 28 with [spoiler]the plan to permanently kill/seal Yuuka[/spoiler]). What pissed Yuuka off isn't that Yuyuko Ate Mystia, but that Mystia was aware of the experience the whole time as it happened. Had Yuyuko at least killed Mystia beforehand, it wouldn't have been as bad as it was, odd as that may seem.


    I think that [spoiler]Mima was right, and that the Gems used against Yuuka[/spoiler] actually worked, but that [spoiler]they didn't work as expected because Mima was right[/spoiler]. If that's the case, talk about an "Oh Shit" moment.
  9. Also, Taker said that [spoiler]Yuuka's an eldritch abomination, which explains all her torture, wanton killing, and madness inducing[/spoiler] in the TVTropes Touhou thread.

    And Eirin still acts like a bitch after that.
  10. biigoh Hmmmm?

    I think the gem worked PERFECTLY. Only Yuuka isn't a supernatural entity.

    What if, she's from the future and is actually a biological plant/human THING designed by human (or not so human) sciences to control plants. Yes, Yuuka is in reality a generic HYPER SCIENCE gardener/farmer assistant. And everything that she can do is because of her discovering plants crafted by SCIENCE!, as well as magical plants and well... more plants plants plants from who knows where.

    Imagine the shit storm if Yuuka reveals that she's a mass production type creature.
  11. Actually, [spoiler]TakerFoxx says he wants to make Ex-Rumia eventually become a mook maker.[/spoiler]
  12. TakerFoxx Dead Parrot

    Wait. Wait a minute. When the deuce did this happen? :eek:
  13. Blame Robo Jesus.

    Also, Hi.
  14. TakerFoxx Dead Parrot

    'Sup, Jack.
  15. Robo Jesus Your Mechanical Messiah

    Sup' TakerFoxx. I'm nicknaming you TFX though from here on out.;):D:p
  16. TakerFoxx Dead Parrot

    That sounds like a mountain bike rally or an MTV show. 0_o

    And a Spacebattles thread. Wow. Ass on floor, jaw not too far away. Dude, thank you so much.

    Please, let this thread not die.
  17. TFX seriously sounds like a Cable Network...

    If you want, you can post a copy here, but... er... too much reformatting to get it on SB effectively, unless you're like me and make two separate copies, one for ff.net and one for BBcode boards.

    Anyway, theory as to why you're popular is because your story isn't a shipping fic! YAAAY
  18. Robo Jesus Your Mechanical Messiah

    Bwahaha. I'll call you TF then.:D:p

    I'm surprised that this thread is the reason you joined. Seriously, you should have joined SB earlier. I'm glad this caught your attention though. Tell me, since you're here and all, what caused you to start writing IM? What has been the most entertaining/amusing part you've written so far in your opinion, and what part of the story do you think has caused you the most difficulty/troubles in writing it?

    As for feedback, the style used in Chapter 28 worked. However, I would advise to not use it too much, as it works best when used sparingly.
  19. I told him to join earlier when it was still around chapter 20. TAKER Y U NO LISTEN?

    And yeah, the second person worked well in that chapter. I'd suggest keeping it only to The Storm.
  20. TakerFoxx Dead Parrot

    You did? I, uh, forgot. Yeah. Sorry. :(

    A few months after I got into the Touhou project, I started thinking about the large amount of characters and how, in all the fanworks I had seen up to that point, they tended to stay within their own little groups. Which makes sense, but I started wondering what personality clashes would happen if several random characters were thrown together. This led to me picturing a scene that has numerous characters hiding in a cave from some sort of danger and discussing/arguing about what to do next. However, that just got me curious about what the danger in question was. And I just kept working backwards from there until I had the scenario for chapter one worked out, at which point I thought "Hell, why not?" and went and wrote it.

    Hmmm, my personal favorite bit would have to be the Deep Within mini-arc. I was on vacation in my friend's mountain cabin at the time and just spent most of the week working on that and had a blast. Also, any scene with Yuuka in it just seems to write itself. I'm also rather fond of The Gods Must Be Lazy. What can I say? I love Team Nineball. :D

    The most difficult parts would be the ones that involve new characters and locations. Some characters don't click right away, so figuring them out can be a hassle. And I hate doing descriptions, which is part of the reason the last chapter had so much, sort of a way to force myself to do them and get used to it. Kind of overkill, but hopefully it'll help in the long run.

    Though as for which chapter gave me the most trouble, that's easy. To Serve and Protect was a real bitch, and it's also probably the weakest chapter to date. Ah well, live and learn.

    And yeah, that big chunk at the beginning is the most that style's going to be used. For the rest of the arc, it's mostly just going to be Yuuka cutting in with commentary.
  21. I liked To Serve and Protect, actually.
  22. TakerFoxx Dead Parrot

    It wasn't horrible, I just felt it could have come out a lot better than it did.
  23. TakerFoxx Dead Parrot

    Putting this update announcement here for the three or four people on this site that actually read this story. ;) Hopefully we'll see some new faces here soon.
  24. "Hi."

    I laughed.

    That's a Discworld reference, right?
  25. TakerFoxx Dead Parrot

    Not intentionally. I was actually thinking of the scene from the Dark Knight, when the Joker shows up in a nurse outfit.
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