Mass Effect: Glorious Shotgun Princess (ME/Exalted)

The skyline of Illium passes by, upside down. Rolling onto her stomach, Miranda finds herself struggling to be snarky, biting, or observant as she realizes that the pilot is weaving through traffic upside down.

She settles for screaming.

“Get us close!” Jane yells, “Then I can jump over and punch her engine!”

“Really?” Joker asks, “Shepard are you sure?”

“I came back from Alchera as a superhuman, Joker.”

A pause. The pilot sucks his teeth, and finally shrugs.

“Okay. Cool. Always wanted Power Girl as a drinking buddy.”

Nope, it was definitely a Ford LTD ('86/'87 Crown Victoria edition, if memory serves).

For reference

YAY! I helped!

Power Girl...Shepard is THAT stacked now?

Damn.

She's going to have to start buying custom armour, I'm sure.

"Joker, are you looking at my chest?"

"Well I'm not going to lie to you..."

...Is it bad that in a setting with hot blue psychic alien chicks, badass dinosaur-dudes, hysterical singing scientists, and Solar Exalted Shepard, that the wise-cracking cripple who pilots like a maniac is now my favorite character?

... I approve of a red-headed Power Girl in N7 armor.

Considering she normally destroys her armor, leaving her naked, yes.

Everybody loves Joker. Except for Sovereign, Harbringer, and Nihilus. Look how they all turned out. Let's face it, anyone who can look a solar exalt in the eyes and go 'okay. Been there, done that, you bring nachos this time commander?' is a fan favorite.

Ah, Javik wasn't a big fan of Joker!

"Seriously, you have to jump onto the car? You come back as a superhero, and you can't fly? Because seriously, you need to get, like, a lawyer on call and talk with whoever gave you those superpowers to-"

"Joker. Drive."

"Yes, Ma'am. Don't punchsplode me."

Punchsplode is my new favorite word.

Pretty soon, mooks are going to run in horror when they hear Shepard is coming. You can't shoot her, and she will punch your liver out through your mouth.

Also, Shepard has/needs another custom charm. It allows her to use Martial Arts as an ability for Parry MDV. Yes, she can punch your arguments.

There's an Athletics charm for that! Eagle-Wing Prana. Essence 4, unfortunately.

(Of course, Adorjan can do it better and faster with Earth-Skimming Gale Tread by offering it at Ess 3, removing the flight ceiling at Ess 4, and doing it forever at Ess 5, but that's a ways off. Oh, and requires a bit of soul-selling.)

Which is staying in the cup despite Joker driving upside down, much like Miranda didn't stay in her seat.

Seconded.

"Don't tell anyone but i stuck a microchip with a dab of eezo on the bottom of my coffee up." Joker Whipsered to Liara as Miranda threw up in the nearby bushes.

If you like him in this one, have you read Gregg's ME: Circular yet?

If you haven't, quick spoiler: He drives the Normandy like he's driving this car. With Sovereign chasing him. Until Joker blows up a volcano in Sovereign's face. Not a happy Reaper.

Wow. I love ME and I really love Exalted. GreggHL, you are combining the two fo them beautifully. Of course, while I love whats going on, I am very interested what is coming next.

Given Jokers attitude, I can almost see him, after Shepard lands on the getaway car and starts doing her stuff, turning to the others and saying "On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd say about 7 on the superhero awesome landing style competition..."

Joker to Shepard seems to be just like Launchpad to DWD.

...dangit, now I'm picturing a Mako with a grinning duck beak...

As for what Joker was doing on Illium, it may be answered if/when they reach the Azure club and the reception VI goes:
"Back so soon, Mr. Moreau? Shall I inform your usual companions?"

The Look Liara would give him would break a few bones by itself.

"What? Asari are the only ones I can have fun with without breaking a hip in the process."

Too coy.
You also forgot the hanar.