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(MLP) All-American Girl rewrite

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Shinzakura, Jan 28, 2013.

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  1. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

    TrivetLurker likes this.
  2. Cody Fett

    Cody Fett Transitional Phrase Nut

    Heh, had a bit of a start when this was first posted. Thought it was the brand new second chapter. Wasn't a problem in the end though.

    So . . . Minty seems to be getting a lot more screen time in this early chapters. Are we going to see more of her in the later chapters a well? 'Cause, given the way she was before the rewrite, those don't seem to be a lot of scenes where she can come in. However, given that there's a whole new chapter coming up, things might change a lot in that regard.
     
  3. Wade Garrett

    Wade Garrett Cranky peasant throwing rocks at the castle.

    The drama...ouch.
    There's no fight like a family fight, where everyone involved knows exactly what buttons to push and where to stick the knives in.
     
  4. Actually it feels like, at least when DJ was a young teen, that both sides were mashing those buttons without even realizing they are there, or at best grossly underestimating their effect on the other. Assumptions, ignorance, and lots of hurtful words before either side really absorbed that mother and daughter grew up in cultures alien to the other. From there action and reaction spiral outwards.
     
  5. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

  6. Cody Fett

    Cody Fett Transitional Phrase Nut

    I'm guessing it's going to be Derpy that eventually convinces Autumn to not divorce Ditzy, 'cause I don't think that he's going to stop on his own at this point.
     
  7. Questiondeca

    Questiondeca A little hard of hearing in one ear. Super Awesome Happy Fun Time

    Fixed for you.
     
  8. Itsune

    Itsune Ship's Cat, part time Gunner,and back-up Pilot.

    My only problem, so far, is that "Google Docs" borks on the browser at the local library.
    Do you have this posted elswhere?
     
  9. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

    farsan likes this.
  10. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

  11. Questiondeca

    Questiondeca A little hard of hearing in one ear. Super Awesome Happy Fun Time

    Gah, wall of text for the IPad.
     
  12. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

  13. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

  14. Cody Fett

    Cody Fett Transitional Phrase Nut

  15. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

    There's a point you're trying to make, right? :D
     
  16. Cody Fett

    Cody Fett Transitional Phrase Nut

    Well, yes, that'll it'll be amusing as all get up to see people jump to conclusions about who's really going to do what.
     
  17. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

    And so it's started. Why does everyone seem to think there's a plot twist involved when they've seen everything already?
     
  18. Cody Fett

    Cody Fett Transitional Phrase Nut

    Because there are people out there that have read Polarity but not AAG? I don't know man, but it's an interesting social experiment if nothing else . . . Oh, and I'm sure there's a lot of people out there who are going to get their hearts broken when that that final chapter comes along.
     
  19. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

    But the majority of readers who think there's a twist are AAG readers as well.
     
  20. Itsune

    Itsune Ship's Cat, part time Gunner,and back-up Pilot.

    Because you are an Author, and thusly damned to be painted as such by the same twisted and broken brush, as all good authors seem to be.
     
  21. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

    Thanks!
     
  22. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

  23. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

  24. Coiler

    Coiler Little Boot Emperor Super Awesome Happy Fun Time



    So, how many police departments decide to go after gangs on the basis of how mean their names sound, rather than their actual threat? This explanation for this new "Republic of Pirates" is dumb in a different way from the old one, and it's still really dumb.
     
    Sum Sine Regno and Roadie like this.
  25. Shinzakura

    Shinzakura Yeah, that guy.

    Contrariwise, how many groups chose their names - and still do - because they know they can get away with more if they have a non-offensive name. Hell, the Sea Shepards (a splinter group of Greenpeace known for their violent anti-whaling tactics) chose their name intentionally as a legal tactic in order to prevent checked out. It does happen, and there are groups out there who would go by "The Pretty Fairies" if they could make the name one of fear. You may think it's dumb - hell, I honestly agree on principal - but it doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
     
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