Mobile Fighter Evangelion (AU/NOT a Gundam Crossover)

Keep up the good work..

You eventually plan on cross posting this an FF.net?

Once I get Chapter 1 done with. :3

Misato's driving skills aren't bad; they just weren't meant for cars.

The road suddenly began to vibrate. Moments later, it rumbled again. “Misato…did you feel that?”

“Well kid, if you know why you’re here, you better get a good look at what you’re about to fight.” Misato brought the bike to a halt, staring at the nearby mountain range to the east. VTOLs could be seen hovering over the expanse, firing enough munitions to level Tokyo-1 all over again.

Their target calmly stepped beyond the mountains, as if oblivious to the missiles being fired at it.

It was humanoid in shape, yet bearing no characteristics that could be deemed ‘human’. Its body was forest green in color, and easily over twenty stories tall. It had long, lanky arms that went past the knees, ending in three segmented talons. Spiky protrusions of bone could be seen all over its form, seeming to mimic ribs and shoulder blades. Thick carapaces of the same bone-colored material covered the hips and shoulders, as if it were armor. Singular lances protruded from the elbows, sharp enough to impale VTOLs (which they were doing, coincidentally). The face was a simple white mask with eyeholes; the only distinguishing feature was the sharp beak extending from the bottom, which gave off the impression of a bird’s skull as a child would perceive it. However, the most eye-catching characteristic was the giant red orb lodged into the monster’s sternum.

Shinji gaped at the sheer size of the behemoth. “That’s…the Angel?”

“The Third Angel,” remarked Misato, thoughts spinning as she tried to recall their current position. Only a few miles away from the nearest Geofront access junction…but we’re between Tokyo-3 and the Angel. “It’s going to be coming in our direction.”

Shinji didn’t really have anything to say, given that he was still staring at the giant. So this was what his parents had prepared for: fighting monsters that seemed far more intimidating than Gojira could ever hope to be. “Er…shouldn’t we be going now…?”

The Angel blinked owlishly at the VTOLs before turning towards the duo. The eyeholes on the face seemed to contract upon seeing them.

“Misato…?”

It was actually looking at them.

“Um…”

A yellow light seemed to emerge out of nowhere, illuminating the space about the Third Angel. With the faintest of motions, the titan leapt into the air, a strange moan warbling throughout the outskirts of Tokyo-3.

“FLOOR IT!!!”

Misato twisted the handlebar, the bike’s engine snarling as she drove towards the Angel.

“Misato, WRONG WAY!”

“Let me drive Shinji,” growled Misato as the Third Angel got closer and closer-

“MISATO!!!”

The duo barely avoided the Angel’s feet. The roadway crumbled under its weight, forcing Misato to weave back and forth to avoid the new pitfalls. Not to be deterred, the Angel aimed its palms at the ground.

KREEN!

With a high-pitched shriek, violet lances erupted from the Angel’s palms, trying to impale Shinji and Misato.

“Gah, MISATO!” Shinji’s eyes darted back and forth between the lances, feeling as though lightning was trying to strike them. One mishap and they would be pulverized. Though, to be honest, Misato’s absolutely insane driving was almost as bad. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”

“Keeping us alive.” Misato immediately veered to the right, ducking into an alleyway.

Less than a second later, the Angel’s lances impacted the foundations of the buildings on both sides, causing them to crumble inwards. Shinji screamed as the alleyway began to collapse.

Misato quickly pressed a blue button by the acceleration handle, prompting an injection of nitrous oxide into the intake valve.

FWOOM.

Misato and Shinji shot out of the alleyway like a bullet, barely avoiding being crushed by the collapsing buildings. However, the sheer speed meant that, even with countersteering, Misato couldn’t turn too quickly without wiping out. She was slowly curving towards the nearest building, prompting Shinji to scream for dear life.

Misato only smirked as her left thumb hovered over a red button. “Hang on tight and lean forward!” She pressed it.

The frame of the motorcycle, situated over the front wheel, suddenly opened up to reveal a pair of small thrusters that extended to the sides by two feet each. Misato twisted the right handlebar, manipulating the axle that the thrusters were situated on until they were aiming towards the ground.

Shinji, meanwhile, couldn’t help but stare at the looming wall. “MISATO?!?!”

She pressed the red button again.

With a furious howl, the thrusters ignited, lifting the front of the motorcycle into the air. At that precise moment, Misato leaned to the left, allowing the front wheel to come in contact with the side of the wall. With uncanny precision, the Lieutenant Colonel twisted the right handlebar just as the back wheel came into contact with the wall, causing the thrusters to press the wheels AGAINST the building’s rock-hard surface. As she was doing this, she pressed the blue button again with her left hand, injecting more N2O into the engine.

FWOOOM!

The combination of these factors – sufficient thrust to press the bike against the building, leaning forward to reduce air resistance, and enough speed to propel the bike forward despite gravity and friction – was what enabled Misato Katsuragi to figuratively and literally drive Shinji up a wall.

The young boy couldn’t help but boggle as the motorcycle neared the edge of the building’s side. At the moment, they were over fifteen stories high. “Oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh CRAAAAA-!”

Misato held the red button down, causing the thrusters to disengage and recede. Right as the bike went airborne, she pressed a yellow button that sat underneath the blue and red ones.

From the compartment behind the leather seat, twin rods extended above their heads, each one expanding out by ten yards. Instantaneously, rigid wings comprised of a durable red polymer splayed out, catching the wind and enabling them to glide.

Shinji was understandably bewildered. I’m currently gliding. On a motorcycle.

The Third Angel, meanwhile, was once again beset by the JSSDF, its attention now on the artillery cannons peppering it from the south. With its former targets no longer within sight, it focused on the immediate threat (if the JSSDF could even be called a ‘threat’).

Shinji, heart pounding like a jackhammer, quietly looked at the Third Angel’s shrinking form as it waded into the JSSDF’s defensive lines. Then he looked at the large wings that had suddenly sprouted out of the back of the motorcycle. Then he gazed down at the ground, idly noting that they were slowly descending.

Then he turned towards Misato. “…did you have this bike custom-made?”

“Yep!” Misato flashed Shinji a happy grin. “She’s a beauty, isn’t she?”

“…sure, yeah…” And now I know why my father hired you, dryly thought Shinji, dreading the idea of NERV being populated by people just as crazy as his father or the Lieutenant Colonel. “Can we get back on the ground now?”

“Sure thing, Shinji, we’re almost…there…” Misato’s voice died off, her jaw going slack as if seeing something horrible.

Confused, Shinji turned his head, noticing that the VTOLs were retreating from the Angel as it neared the artillery cannons, disappearing beyond the mountain range. “Why are they leaving…?”

“No…they’re using an N2 mine!!!” Misato swiftly pried handgrips out from a compartment beneath the handlebars. With a push of the left grip and a pull of the right, the wings promptly tilted, causing them to turn towards the nearest evacuated building.

“Uh…Misato, what are you-?!”

Shinji wisely shut up when Misato pulled an Uzi out of her jacket.

Batabatabatabatabata!

Nine millimeter rounds shattered the glass window on the sixth floor, revealing an opening into an office complex. With a press of the yellow button, the wings on Misato’s bike began to recede, prompting an immediate downward acceleration. Granted, it didn’t matter, because they had been gliding towards the seventh floor anyway. As Shinji’s stomach nearly dropped out, the motorcycle fell through the opening to the sixth floor, the wings just fitting through as they came to a stop amongst a row of empty cubicles. The motorcycle’s engine calmed to a quiet putter, barely audible over Shinji’s panicked breathing.

“Alright! Timed it perfectly!” exclaimed Misato with a grin.

“Yeah…perfect timing…” groaned Shinji, wearily leaning back against the seat.

That’s when the building rumbled, computers and papers falling over. The rest of the glass behind them shattered; even though they were on the wrong side of the building to see the blast of the N2 mine, the ambient light from the explosion could still be seen. The shockwave from the blast roiled through the air, knocking out windows and tossing cars as far as the eye could see. Fortunately, Tokyo-3 proper was still several miles away, and was untouched by the blast.

Not that Shinji knew that; at the moment, he was busy performing some cost-benefit analysis in his head. He quickly concluded that piloting the Evangelion to fight the Third Angel couldn't possibly be as harrowing as Misato’s driving.

“Well Shinji-kun, we’re in the clear! Let’s hurry up and get you to NERV!” After an affectionate pat of her red warhorse, Misato revved the engine and slowly drove through the building.

After everything that had just occurred, driving down the emergency stairwell to get to the first floor was downright anticlimactic.

Shinji did not mind that at all.

So THIS is what Misato's like when someone encourages her to become more insane.

I like it.

*LOL*

Misato is actually a BIGGER maniac than in canon.

I like it!

It's a requirement for new employees to ride backseat to Misato on the "Testing Ground for Prospects", aka "Misato's Obstacle Course."

The longer you can hang on without screaming for Misato to stop, the greater your probability of getting promoted.

I suppose after that you'd no longer fear death. *lol*

Hahaha! Nice one. Yeah, not meant for cars indeed.

GAH! Too much win! Can't... hold on... much... LONGER! Speach... becoming Shatnerized!

Wow. You go, Mistato. I can just imagine that she's decked out with all sorts of gadgets for any occasion, reading this.

I think I know the picture your talking about. Wasn't Asuka in her uniform? It was back when I was chasing down old robotech comics.

Um, just to point this out, the power that Nitrous gives to an engine is often to much for a motorcycle, the sudden acceleration can pull the bike out from under you because you are not physically strapped to it. A seat with a backrest is often enough to keep the passengers on the bike, but will cause them to become far more intimate with each other than they would otherwise.

And how is this a problem?

Regarding the intimacy: Shinji was too terrified to care, and Misato wouldn't care either way.

Also, there's actually a good reason Misato has nitrous for her motorcycle. Here's how the end of her job interview went:

xx

"So Katsuragi, your resume is very impressive..."

"Thank you Professor Ikari."

"Do you own your own method of transportation? NERV has a small stipend for employees who live outside of the Geofront."

"Well, I have this beat-up car, but I'm trying to save up money for a motorcycle."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, I've always wanted one! Er, forgive me for indulging sir..."

"No, go on. Indulge."

"They were just really cool to look at as a little kid! I even fantasized about special gadgets and stuff to put on it, like nitrous, the ability to fly, that sort of thing...it was all kids' stuff though. I just think motorcycles are fun to drive. Plus, I don't seem to have as many problems driving them as I do with cars."

"..."

"Sir?"

"You have ambitious vision and you know what you want. You're also slightly demented. I respect that."

"Er...thanks?"

"You're hired."

"Really?"

"Send me your proposal and you'll have your bike within the month."

"...REALLY? Thank you sir!"

After Misato left, Gendo picked up the secure line and dialed a particular number.

"Hello, this is NERV-Alaska. How can I help you?"

"This is Professor Gendo Ikari."

"Oh, hello sir! C-Can I help you today?"

"Get me Dr. Mondschein. I have a special project for him."

xx

And that's why Misato's bike is super special awesome. And can handle nitrous.

As long as this "intimate" doesn't require paramedics to separate the passengers, it isn't.

Never said it was, I was just pointing out a detail that could cause problems in the future.

Besides all signs point to Misato driving a racing bike, so there's no possibility for sexy seat shenanigans.

Her bike is basically a 'Go Go Gadget/Speed Racer' homage to Akira.



This bike was the particular model I had in mind:



Consider Misato's a fusion of the two, if you will.

Huh, I half-expected Misato to use the blast from the N2 mine to rocket jump over the angel to safety. But that might be too crazy?

And let me guess, the only one to out last Misato was Gendo, who is now actively goading her on.

Why do I see him telling her that launching yourself out a railgun is fun, AND WHY DOES THIS MAKE SENSE.

If this crosses over with ND .... oh dear mother of god.

Just wait till Asuka and Kaworu show up. They'll have to do it like everyone else has.

...

BAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Oh god! Of course get Dr. Mondschein to make the kickass/ridiculous bike! Kickass/ridiculous is his job!

I approve. Endlessly.

Well, you just confirmed this for '70s super robot show'.

Yes, I've always felt that a Gendo who is Crazy Awesome without a Yui leans more towards the Crazy side...

...I just hope this Gendo hasn't built his own Giant Robot...

Gendo's personal robot would be a giant Kamina. With SHADES.

Nowhere near completed, but this fic contains a good vision of what Gendo's personal robot would look like (okay, so more like personal power armor but)...
Please don't bump it.