Since a half year old thread decided go all Jesus on Easter on us, and is thus WAY over the 20 page limit, here's a new thread. Edit: Crap, forgot to explain what this threads about. Here's the short and narrow of it: Take any piece of fiction from any form of media, and write a one sentence summary that is both horribly misleading yet technically accurate. Example: Archie Sonic: Furries fight against transhumanism.
FireFall: Rock falls, everyone without a jetpack dies. Mistborn: Alchemist assassins try to overthrow the government. Starcraft II Wings of Liberty: A Terrorist steals jewellery to mind wipe his ex.
Neverwinter nights: Nameless adventurer kills vengeful paladin. Elder Scrolls V: Ex-con learns to warp reality with his voice, uses to slaughter an endangered species. RAGE: Sole survivor of a civilisation is sent alone to murder people by post-apcolopytic psychopaths. The Witcher: Kill monsters, collect trading cards. Jade Empire: Expert marital artist does his master proud, then student kills him.
Bladerunner: Hitman hired to kill escaped slaves. Godzilla: Man made disaster strikes Tokyo King Kong: Escaped wild animal gunned down by police. Citizen Kane: Dying man mentions an old toy. Star Wars Saga: Religious fanatics plot to kill legally elected head of state. Star Trek: Colonialist aggressors stake tenuous claims to uncharted territory, repeatedly refuse to aid less advanced cultures.
Alpha Centauri: Natives attempt to resist colonists after unprovoked attacks. The world ends with you: Girl dies after wishing she was more like her anorexic friend. Prototype: Psychotic General attempts to nuke Manhattan after the outbreak of a disease. FFVii: Warhero suffers a psychotic episode after several solid days of reading. Katawa Shoujo: A young man suffers from a broken heart.
Elder Scrolls IV: Ex-Con does pretty much everything but what s/he sets out to do. Baldurs Gate Saga: Man works out his daddy issues. Mass Effect 3: Yo dawg...
Stargate SG1: Primitive world takes technology left by other races and wages an aggressive military campaign against two of its neighbors, eventually exterminating one of them.
Oh my goodness, I just thinking of doing a summary of that before I read the OP Monster Rancher: Young woman gathers a harem, reconnects with dad. Something Wicked This Way Comes: Janitor kicks evil wizard's ass. Sailor Moon S: Scientific foundation destroyed by Luddite teenagers.
Halo Reach: A 'you are there' style documentary in which the viewer gets to know a group of war heroes as people, only to watch them die one by one while fighting against a technologically superior foe in a futile attempt to save their homeworld. Halo ODST: A mute searches for his coworkers. Star Trek: TOS: Crewmen die while the captain chases skirts and acts outside of his authority.
You guys are so bad at this Mass Effect 3: The saviors of galactic civilization for more than a billion years are defeated by Commander Shepard, charismatic terrorist and mass murderer, and his violent, warmongering allies. Syndicate: Businessman in a stylish coat travels around the world to deal with business rivals and skeptics.
Total Recall: Man struggles with memory issues. Command & Conquer: UN organization persecutes religious minority. Red Alert: Einstein takes a trip to a local landmark.
Elder Scrolls V: A younger child, rightfully sentanced to death, commits attempted familicide in a blood-drenched quest for revenge. :edit: Stupid numbering.
Star Wars - A New Hope: Terrorists kill many tens of thousands in attack against a space station of the legitimate government.
El Goonish Shive (Pre-Painted Black): Mad Scientist Teen subjects his friends to twisted experiments.
