Get out of here with those lame bug master powers. This Taylor triggers with an awesome wet tinker power. Not a wet tinker, more a tinker that is wet. Instead of taking to the boardwalk at night and fighting a dragon like a certain insectophile, Taylor goes to the ship graveyard and makes oodles of moist inventions (most of which explode, making everyone wet), and also makes some friends.
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Tinker Taylor Super Soaker [Worm-AltPower]
- Thread starter Rouge Rogue
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Tinker Taylor Super Soaker
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Threadmarks Sidestory Apocrypha Informational
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Statistics (16 threadmarks, 61k words)
User Total Rouge Rogue 16 Threadmarks
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Chapter 1 - Splish Splash, Oh Shit I Fucked Up
Rouge Rogue
Words are absurd
Tagline: Get out of here with those lame bug master powers. This Taylor triggers with an awesome wet tinker power. Not a wet tinker, more a tinker that is wet. Instead of taking to the boardwalk at night and fighting a dragon like a certain insectophile, Taylor goes to the ship graveyard and makes oodles of moist inventions (most of which explode, making everyone wet), and also makes some friends.
Author's Note: The stuff I have of this is going to be uploaded quickly, because I don't even know what I've done here. That means the first six chapters of this thing are going to be uploaded within two weeks of the first release, so that's something to look forward to if this ends up being something you enjoy. I'm not much of a crack writer, but this story occurred to me at 5am when I was trying to get to sleep, so it's going to be the closest I get. I was a little loopy making the first draft, and I wrote four chapters in less than a day without sleeping. Hence, the quick initial release schedule. I've continued with this idea because it's become something of an experiment for me. Anyway, I hope this is an enjoyable read.
The ship graveyard was a mixture of heaven and hell on earth. For most, it was a blight on the landscape of Brockton Bay, as if anything wasn’t a blight in this complete wreck of a city. For some, it was a reminder of what once was, before all the business dried up. For others, it was in the way.
Hell for all of the above.
But then there were the others who saw it in a different light. The ones who saw it as shelter, a place to put a semi-rusted roof over your head for a night. Somewhere to hang out with your friends, where you wouldn’t get the pigs bearing down on you to break up a good time. Or maybe it was somewhere you went just to get away from people.
Heaven for all of the above. I used it for all that and more.
Ah… minus the friends part. I didn’t have any, not anymore. Anyway, the greatest thing about the ship graveyard was all that *Scrap Metal*. This place could occupy me for a whole day, then I would clean up and go home to spend hours tossing and turning in bed with my fingers twitching, wanting to get back out here.
So here I was. Taylor Hebert, Tinker in the Grave.
I didn’t have a costume, but I did have a mask. Just pieces of metal that I cut and shaped into a… well- a shape. Look, it covered my face, it was a cool shape, and it only cut my cheek once before I put padding on the side in contact with my face and rounded off the sharp edges.
As for actual tinker tech… I had a project. It was coming along slowly, but it was coming along. It only exploded once, I swear. That had been weird to see on TV. Made weirder by the fact that Dad and I were both watching the news at the same time. That was the first time that had happened since mom died…
I paused, standing on top of an overturned ship that gave me a view of the graveyard. It really went on for quite a while. Looking back told me that I was ten minutes climb away from the boardwalk, and the water wasn’t that far away in a separate direction. I knew that.
Another thing about the Ship Graveyard. It’s hella fun to skid down the sides of dead ships.
The ride ended too soon and I landed with a flourish. Resisting the urge to bow, I hopped over another few ships and found the space I was using as my workshop. Inside was my second project, which I was itching to work on.
No fewer than thirteen separate ideas had occurred to me on the climb over, and that number was dwarfed by the twenty seven I had in the honest-to-god five minute shower I had in the morning. Normally ideas didn’t come so fast, but today it seemed things were meant to flow.
My second project was really my third, and my first was really my second. The absolute first thing I did after choosing this derelict ship as my workshop was to give it a good old power wash. A pipe attached to a hoze with an improvised nozzle, coupled with whatever the hell it was that let me do the things I did had all the grime, mold, and other icky stuff out in less than three hours.
I even found a nest of spiders cleaning it out. That had nearly made me abandon this spot for somewhere else.
Now, my workshop sparkled it was so clean, or it did when it had light inside. With barely a thought, I found the electric lantern I kept here and replaced the batteries. I had left it on the night before and only remembered when I was halfway home. So I just stole the batteries from the remote to use here and made a mental note to buy replacements on the way home.
Wait, I already bought the replacements. They’re in my pocket right now.
The thought came too late. I had already snapped the lid on the batteries closed and moved on to other things. Oh well. But now I had light in my workshop and I grinned as I took in my two projects in progress.
Project Number One, if you counted from zero, was a replica of Armsmaster’s halberd. It had the exact same dimensions, but barely any of the functionalities. That was a head scratcher because I really wasn’t sure how to put any more tech in there. My power had about five ideas at the idle thought, however. One of which didn’t even really work.
Project Number Two, also if you counted from zero, was a dragon suit. Okay, that was an exaggeration, it was a Taylor suit. Right now comparing it to the illustrious technology invented by Dragon was nothing short of insulting the world renowned tinker. It also wasn’t really giving off the same aesthetic as Dragon’s genuine creations did.
I put that one down to me. Having spent a fair amount of time, and two notebooks, rattling off designs and generally being introspective, I had come to the conclusion that I knew what my tinker specialisation was.
Water.
Or dihydrogenmonoxide, if you wanted to use all those silly chemistry terms.
I had researched tinkers a bit and found that some drew inspiration from other tinkers. Me making a dragon suit was just me doing exactly that, with the added quirk of replacing any power source with something steam powered. That’s how my tinker speciality worked. Hopefully I would find the confidence to branch out and do something of my own. I had the ideas and some designs, but I wanted to get something actually finished first.
My dragon suit had ended up with a lot more steam vents than I initially thought necessary. But if I wanted to ride around in that thing, then I would need to keep it cool. Steam, pressured steam no less, tended to be hot.
Like me. I thought idly, then frowned. Am I hot?
When I’m riding a dragon suit I’m gonna be so fucking hot.
With that spontaneous boost of confidence I spent the time I should have spent at school building a badass dragon suit.
I stopped working when my lantern winked out. Fortunately I had replacement batteries, so it wasn’t really a problem. Once again moving around a lit space, I almost went back to work when I glanced at the entrance and saw that it was dark outside. A groan escaped me when I realised I should really get back home before Dad came back from spending too much time at work.
Again.
But first… My badass dragon suit had gotten a face lift today. Now I actually felt comfortable calling it a Dragon suit with a capital D. The lantern going out had almost perfectly coincided with me finishing the last subroutine before starting on a new one. I had stepped back only to inspect pitch darkness.
Given what I had seen of Dragon’s suits in action on internet videos, I estimated that my suit was operating roughly around the twentieth percentage point of one of Dragon’s. I wanted to turn it on.
No one was around to stop me, so I did.
The suit whirred to life and steam vented as the systems spun into action for the first time. One of the vents hit my knee and I jumped back as I hissed in pain. It almost made me miss how the suit moved by itself for the first time. It went from a slumped down position to a slightly less slumped down position.
Fuck me, that was so cool.
Grinning madly, I inspected the thing, making sure all the joints were sitting right, that nothing had gotten caught on anything and damaged the interior. Then I opened the back of the thing and stared at the place that was meant for a person. It was pure metal, and I had forgotten to round off some of the inside edges. Work for later when I got around to padding the inside of this thing.
It didn’t stop me from putting my head where it would end up being, though. I realised that I had, somehow, managed to make a heads up display that was actually displaying things. Then remembered doing exactly that somewhere around the middle of the day.
“Woah...” I let out in wonderment of my own achievements. It was displaying suit integrity, power level, and connection. I may have gotten carried away and attempted to link the suit to the internet, but I wasn’t expecting my feebled attempt to actually work.
It connected.
I blinked and immediately jumped backwards away from the thing. The suit started juddering and the back of it closed in an instant with a hiss. There was a very real possibility that I would have lost my head if that had closed with me still in there. Now it was looking around, but each movement was jittery, and it made almost no overall progress.
I reached to my right, where I knew my copy of Armsmaster’s Halberd was and gripped it tight. It had maybe half charge since the explosion that made the news. I knew that it could cut the suit if I needed it to, but I didn’t want to have to. The suit was my baby. I made that thing as well as the thing I would probably end up using to kill it. I was in a situation where the best course of action was to force my eldest son to kill his younger brother.
“*********” The suit was making noise, but nothing comprehensible. Duh, I hadn’t started on the interior speaker system yet. Or the exterior speaker system, for that matter.
The younger brother in question had successfully looked at one wall, and was looking in the other direction to the door. It saw the door and with a considerably less jittery leap, left my workshop, taking a good chunk of the wall with it.
Just like that, my workshop was ruined.
It made me pout, but I chased after my errant child like a responsible mother would. As an afterthought I picked up my mask, as well as project number three which I spent maybe half an hour on today? It wasn’t finished, not by a long shot. Heh. But I wasn’t expecting to come back here now that the door had been multiplied by four. With that, all my tinker tech had left the building.
My suit wasn’t capable of flight, but it was capable of jumping really fucking far. I was as proud of it as I was horrified that I wouldn’t be able to catch up. It had left in the direction of the boardwalk, the direction where there were buildings. Oh god it’s going towards civilisation.
It hadn’t looked behind itself and seen me in the workshop, so I didn’t know if it was programmed to kill. I hadn’t tried to programme it to kill, but it had a connection to the internet. Anything was possible.
I was five minutes through my hastened climb out of the ship graveyard when I saw the first explosion.
“My baby!” I screamed when I saw it. Then I saw my suit silhouetted against the fireball, sailing through the air. It reached the apex of its jump, changed how it held itself and drop kicked something I couldn’t see.
“I’m so proud of you!” I howled, probably disturbing some sleeping homeless people. Fuck ‘em. My creation took priority.
There was more commotion after that, but on a lesser scale. Every so often I’d get a good vantage point and sneak a glance hoping to see my suit do another epic maneuver. I was disappointed, unfortunately, and hurried along. Remembering to put my mask on only as I was nearing the edge of the Ship graveyard.
I peeked out to see that the fight had left a trail of destruction leading further into the boardwalk. First I checked to see if there was anyone around, then ran towards the fight when the coast was clear. I did a super awesome slide into a good hiding spot that still gave me a view of the fight and went googly eyed from all the awesome.
My baby was fighting Armsmaster. Not only that, but it was a stalemate.
My suit was using its superior mobility to stay out of Armsmaster’s range, excepting for his grappling hooks. When Armsmaster got a grapple hook attached, the suit would be reeled in in a flash, but that wouldn’t turn out in the hero’s favour. The suit would twist in midair and strike Armsmaster across the chest or head, and the halberd would be handily dodged.
Which was weird. I hadn’t programmed it with combat protocols yet. Just mobility.
Then again… the Internet.
I had to consciously put in effort to stop myself from cheering or groaning. I hadn’t even considered an IFF device, but it was looking like I should install that kind of thing first in all my creations from now on.
“Let her go!” Armsmaster bellowed, making me blink. Had my baby taken someone hostage?
That is unacceptable! My suit had crossed a line, taking someone hostage. But then I took a moment to actually think about it.
The opening in the suit was in the back, and didn’t even open all the way down the legs. Unless it had taken someone very small hostage, or had coaxed someone inside, that was impossible. Then I noticed the red, white, and blue fabric just poking out from the back of the suit’s neck.
My baby kidnapped Miss Militia! Oh god, this was so bad. I was happy that I had made something that could fight on an even footing with Armsmaster, but kidnapping a hero was too far. If they found out it was me, I was in deep shit. I wasn’t sure they’d even consider the fact that this was all a huge accident.
Plus, I was kind of a fan so this was a terrible way to get to know your heroes.
But what to do?
My thoughts were distracted by the sound of engines rumbling. I looked up at the source to see an actual bonafide dragon suit. Oh my god! My suit was toast now, that was for sure. The sacrifice of my baby was worth it if I got to see the actual Dragon in action. Even if it did leave a bad feeling in my stomach.
“Armsmaster.” Dragon said, their voice distorted by a mechanical effect. That was a good idea, I should make a tinker tech mask- “Is Miss Militia still inside the rogue machine?”
“She is.” Armsmaster confirmed as he dodged another drop kick from my suit.
“Confirmed. Switching away from lethal weaponry.”
I laughed to myself a little at that. Dragon had come bearing lethal weaponry first. That was a compliment of the highest order. I just wished that my compliment to them had turned out better.
“Deploying EMP.” Dragon declared, firing a small missile at my suit.
Armsmaster jumped away in time to avoid the shockwave from the missile. There was a moment before he was quickly followed by my suit as it continued its assault.
“That didn’t work.” Armsmaster shouted, using his halberd to ward off attacks. “Why?”
“Potential insulation against such attacks. Possible use of an alternate energy source.”
I sniffed in pride. It was steam powered.There were electrical systems, but everything was sourced from the steam engines. All the EMP did was slow it down.
The blades on Dragon’s suit folded back, leaving their limbs bare. “Engaging.”
Now that there were two heroes ganging up on my suit, they made short work of it. Dragon chased the suit around while Armsmaster set up a trap with his Halberd’s grappling hook. Once hooked, the suit was pulled slowly towards Armsmaster, letting Dragon take point and grapple it.
When Dragon had my suit immobilized, Armsmaster ran up and started tearing away the back of it. The back of Miss Militia quickly became visible and there was soon a hole big enough to pull her out of. Armsmaster counted down with Dragon, who released another EMP burst at the suit in the same moment that he pulled his comrade out from it.
The moment Miss Militia was out of the suit there was a flicker of green and she was holding a shotgun in her hands that she unloaded into the suit. Steam vents were exposed and several moving parts locked up because of the bullets. The suit came to a shuddering halt.
I let out a breath. My baby was dead. I thought a mental prayer and sent Project Number Two away to steam heaven.
Then Miss Militia finished changing her gun and started shooting my dead baby all over again. It fell over and parts went skittering away across the ground. There was a moment of quiet.
“That was unnecessary.” Armsmaster said. “I was planning on studying that.”
“You’re still going to study it.” Miss Militia snapped. “I was trapped in there for too long. Look at my legs!”
I did and winced. There were cuts all over her. That was just cause to prioritise internal cladding in future projects. Sorry Miss Militia.
“Panacea would tell you to stop bothering her with that level of injury.” Armsmaster said dismissively. “Dragon, what can you tell me?”
“This was a very convincing replica of one of my suits. Classification Wyvern MKIV, I believe. It isn’t anywhere near finished, however.”
It is Project Number Two. I thought indignantly. They didn’t hear me.
“Do we know anyone who would copy tinker tech of that level?”
“Just me.” Dragon said, sounding sure. “Perhaps the Simurgh.”
Armsmaster and Miss Militia slumped in resignation when they realised what that meant.
“We have another copy tinker on the loose.” Armsmaster said bitterly. “And a good one at that. Wonderful.”
I felt a gut punch at those words. Was he bitter about little old me? I hadn’t even properly finished Project Number Two. But that could be contrived as a compliment, so I was going to take it as one.
“Dragon, can we rely on you to transport this back to base?” Miss Militia asked.
“You can.” Dragon confirmed, and began gathering the parts that had spilled everywhere. After a few moments they stood and walked up to a building, then knocked.
“I’m going to need a copy of any footage you captured tonight, young man.” Dragon said the moment the door opened.
“Uh…” The boy said, holding a camera in his hands.
Armsmaster and Miss Militia were still on the scene and were moving around to secure the area. It was time for me to leave.
Even after all that I managed to get home before my dad. I hid the halberd and Project Number Three in my room where Dad wouldn’t see if he just walked in, then hit the sack after grabbing something from the fridge. The next day was spent looking for another spot to make a workshop. I didn’t visit my old one, because the heroes had probably found it and would assume I was hostile.
I wasn’t, but they wouldn’t see that at first. Not after Project Number Two.
The memory made me sigh wistfully.
In the end I settled on a spot closer to the water that was a decent distance away from my previous workshop and moved some stuff there. I would have mucked straight into cleaning, but I wanted to catch the news tonight. I wasn’t sure if the words of the presenter fulfilled a dream fantasy, or my worst nightmares.
“A new tinker has terrorised the city of Brockton Bay, nearly killing a member of the Protectorate by releasing a powerful robot with apparent capture and destroy protocols. Witnesses report that the death of Miss Militia likely would have been unavoidable if not for the intervention of Dragon. This mysterious tinker is also being credited with the explosion that occurred in the shipyard six days before.”
Well, there went any chance of me being a hero.
“The PRT has given this new tinker the designation ‘Ouroboros’ due to their ability to produce powerful replica of other parahuman tinker tech, albeit with a heavy water theme, as well as a loose association with Dragon. A PRT spokesperson was quoted saying ‘We really wanted to name them Leviathan, but the actual Leviathan is responsible for killing millions, so we didn’t do that.'"
W-what? Did they just… did they just use my name in the same sentence as Leviathan? Did they just say that they wanted to name me Leviathan? They can’t do that. People would get the wrong idea!
“A physical description of Ouroboros has not been recorded. If you see any capes with an unfamiliar costume, it's best that you keep your distance until more information comes to light. In other news, the slau-” I shut the TV off. The remote still hadn’t had its batteries replaced, so I had to run up to the TV and push the button myself.
This was so unfair! I found myself running up to my bed and screaming into the pillow while also punching it as hard as I could. Then I was done and stood up to be a reasonable person. But then I wasn’t done and went back to screaming into my pillow, but on the floor this time.
I stayed like that for a while, not even in the mood to jot down any notes for designs.
Dad came home and spent some time downstairs. Then he went to bed.
I wanted to scream into my pillow again, but didn’t.
Author's Note: The stuff I have of this is going to be uploaded quickly, because I don't even know what I've done here. That means the first six chapters of this thing are going to be uploaded within two weeks of the first release, so that's something to look forward to if this ends up being something you enjoy. I'm not much of a crack writer, but this story occurred to me at 5am when I was trying to get to sleep, so it's going to be the closest I get. I was a little loopy making the first draft, and I wrote four chapters in less than a day without sleeping. Hence, the quick initial release schedule. I've continued with this idea because it's become something of an experiment for me. Anyway, I hope this is an enjoyable read.
*Splish-Splash*
The ship graveyard was a mixture of heaven and hell on earth. For most, it was a blight on the landscape of Brockton Bay, as if anything wasn’t a blight in this complete wreck of a city. For some, it was a reminder of what once was, before all the business dried up. For others, it was in the way.
Hell for all of the above.
But then there were the others who saw it in a different light. The ones who saw it as shelter, a place to put a semi-rusted roof over your head for a night. Somewhere to hang out with your friends, where you wouldn’t get the pigs bearing down on you to break up a good time. Or maybe it was somewhere you went just to get away from people.
Heaven for all of the above. I used it for all that and more.
Ah… minus the friends part. I didn’t have any, not anymore. Anyway, the greatest thing about the ship graveyard was all that *Scrap Metal*. This place could occupy me for a whole day, then I would clean up and go home to spend hours tossing and turning in bed with my fingers twitching, wanting to get back out here.
So here I was. Taylor Hebert, Tinker in the Grave.
I didn’t have a costume, but I did have a mask. Just pieces of metal that I cut and shaped into a… well- a shape. Look, it covered my face, it was a cool shape, and it only cut my cheek once before I put padding on the side in contact with my face and rounded off the sharp edges.
As for actual tinker tech… I had a project. It was coming along slowly, but it was coming along. It only exploded once, I swear. That had been weird to see on TV. Made weirder by the fact that Dad and I were both watching the news at the same time. That was the first time that had happened since mom died…
I paused, standing on top of an overturned ship that gave me a view of the graveyard. It really went on for quite a while. Looking back told me that I was ten minutes climb away from the boardwalk, and the water wasn’t that far away in a separate direction. I knew that.
Another thing about the Ship Graveyard. It’s hella fun to skid down the sides of dead ships.
The ride ended too soon and I landed with a flourish. Resisting the urge to bow, I hopped over another few ships and found the space I was using as my workshop. Inside was my second project, which I was itching to work on.
No fewer than thirteen separate ideas had occurred to me on the climb over, and that number was dwarfed by the twenty seven I had in the honest-to-god five minute shower I had in the morning. Normally ideas didn’t come so fast, but today it seemed things were meant to flow.
My second project was really my third, and my first was really my second. The absolute first thing I did after choosing this derelict ship as my workshop was to give it a good old power wash. A pipe attached to a hoze with an improvised nozzle, coupled with whatever the hell it was that let me do the things I did had all the grime, mold, and other icky stuff out in less than three hours.
I even found a nest of spiders cleaning it out. That had nearly made me abandon this spot for somewhere else.
Now, my workshop sparkled it was so clean, or it did when it had light inside. With barely a thought, I found the electric lantern I kept here and replaced the batteries. I had left it on the night before and only remembered when I was halfway home. So I just stole the batteries from the remote to use here and made a mental note to buy replacements on the way home.
Wait, I already bought the replacements. They’re in my pocket right now.
The thought came too late. I had already snapped the lid on the batteries closed and moved on to other things. Oh well. But now I had light in my workshop and I grinned as I took in my two projects in progress.
Project Number One, if you counted from zero, was a replica of Armsmaster’s halberd. It had the exact same dimensions, but barely any of the functionalities. That was a head scratcher because I really wasn’t sure how to put any more tech in there. My power had about five ideas at the idle thought, however. One of which didn’t even really work.
Project Number Two, also if you counted from zero, was a dragon suit. Okay, that was an exaggeration, it was a Taylor suit. Right now comparing it to the illustrious technology invented by Dragon was nothing short of insulting the world renowned tinker. It also wasn’t really giving off the same aesthetic as Dragon’s genuine creations did.
I put that one down to me. Having spent a fair amount of time, and two notebooks, rattling off designs and generally being introspective, I had come to the conclusion that I knew what my tinker specialisation was.
Water.
Or dihydrogenmonoxide, if you wanted to use all those silly chemistry terms.
I had researched tinkers a bit and found that some drew inspiration from other tinkers. Me making a dragon suit was just me doing exactly that, with the added quirk of replacing any power source with something steam powered. That’s how my tinker speciality worked. Hopefully I would find the confidence to branch out and do something of my own. I had the ideas and some designs, but I wanted to get something actually finished first.
My dragon suit had ended up with a lot more steam vents than I initially thought necessary. But if I wanted to ride around in that thing, then I would need to keep it cool. Steam, pressured steam no less, tended to be hot.
Like me. I thought idly, then frowned. Am I hot?
When I’m riding a dragon suit I’m gonna be so fucking hot.
With that spontaneous boost of confidence I spent the time I should have spent at school building a badass dragon suit.
*Splish-Splash*
I stopped working when my lantern winked out. Fortunately I had replacement batteries, so it wasn’t really a problem. Once again moving around a lit space, I almost went back to work when I glanced at the entrance and saw that it was dark outside. A groan escaped me when I realised I should really get back home before Dad came back from spending too much time at work.
Again.
But first… My badass dragon suit had gotten a face lift today. Now I actually felt comfortable calling it a Dragon suit with a capital D. The lantern going out had almost perfectly coincided with me finishing the last subroutine before starting on a new one. I had stepped back only to inspect pitch darkness.
Given what I had seen of Dragon’s suits in action on internet videos, I estimated that my suit was operating roughly around the twentieth percentage point of one of Dragon’s. I wanted to turn it on.
No one was around to stop me, so I did.
The suit whirred to life and steam vented as the systems spun into action for the first time. One of the vents hit my knee and I jumped back as I hissed in pain. It almost made me miss how the suit moved by itself for the first time. It went from a slumped down position to a slightly less slumped down position.
Fuck me, that was so cool.
Grinning madly, I inspected the thing, making sure all the joints were sitting right, that nothing had gotten caught on anything and damaged the interior. Then I opened the back of the thing and stared at the place that was meant for a person. It was pure metal, and I had forgotten to round off some of the inside edges. Work for later when I got around to padding the inside of this thing.
It didn’t stop me from putting my head where it would end up being, though. I realised that I had, somehow, managed to make a heads up display that was actually displaying things. Then remembered doing exactly that somewhere around the middle of the day.
“Woah...” I let out in wonderment of my own achievements. It was displaying suit integrity, power level, and connection. I may have gotten carried away and attempted to link the suit to the internet, but I wasn’t expecting my feebled attempt to actually work.
It connected.
I blinked and immediately jumped backwards away from the thing. The suit started juddering and the back of it closed in an instant with a hiss. There was a very real possibility that I would have lost my head if that had closed with me still in there. Now it was looking around, but each movement was jittery, and it made almost no overall progress.
I reached to my right, where I knew my copy of Armsmaster’s Halberd was and gripped it tight. It had maybe half charge since the explosion that made the news. I knew that it could cut the suit if I needed it to, but I didn’t want to have to. The suit was my baby. I made that thing as well as the thing I would probably end up using to kill it. I was in a situation where the best course of action was to force my eldest son to kill his younger brother.
“*********” The suit was making noise, but nothing comprehensible. Duh, I hadn’t started on the interior speaker system yet. Or the exterior speaker system, for that matter.
The younger brother in question had successfully looked at one wall, and was looking in the other direction to the door. It saw the door and with a considerably less jittery leap, left my workshop, taking a good chunk of the wall with it.
Just like that, my workshop was ruined.
It made me pout, but I chased after my errant child like a responsible mother would. As an afterthought I picked up my mask, as well as project number three which I spent maybe half an hour on today? It wasn’t finished, not by a long shot. Heh. But I wasn’t expecting to come back here now that the door had been multiplied by four. With that, all my tinker tech had left the building.
My suit wasn’t capable of flight, but it was capable of jumping really fucking far. I was as proud of it as I was horrified that I wouldn’t be able to catch up. It had left in the direction of the boardwalk, the direction where there were buildings. Oh god it’s going towards civilisation.
It hadn’t looked behind itself and seen me in the workshop, so I didn’t know if it was programmed to kill. I hadn’t tried to programme it to kill, but it had a connection to the internet. Anything was possible.
I was five minutes through my hastened climb out of the ship graveyard when I saw the first explosion.
“My baby!” I screamed when I saw it. Then I saw my suit silhouetted against the fireball, sailing through the air. It reached the apex of its jump, changed how it held itself and drop kicked something I couldn’t see.
“I’m so proud of you!” I howled, probably disturbing some sleeping homeless people. Fuck ‘em. My creation took priority.
There was more commotion after that, but on a lesser scale. Every so often I’d get a good vantage point and sneak a glance hoping to see my suit do another epic maneuver. I was disappointed, unfortunately, and hurried along. Remembering to put my mask on only as I was nearing the edge of the Ship graveyard.
I peeked out to see that the fight had left a trail of destruction leading further into the boardwalk. First I checked to see if there was anyone around, then ran towards the fight when the coast was clear. I did a super awesome slide into a good hiding spot that still gave me a view of the fight and went googly eyed from all the awesome.
My baby was fighting Armsmaster. Not only that, but it was a stalemate.
My suit was using its superior mobility to stay out of Armsmaster’s range, excepting for his grappling hooks. When Armsmaster got a grapple hook attached, the suit would be reeled in in a flash, but that wouldn’t turn out in the hero’s favour. The suit would twist in midair and strike Armsmaster across the chest or head, and the halberd would be handily dodged.
Which was weird. I hadn’t programmed it with combat protocols yet. Just mobility.
Then again… the Internet.
I had to consciously put in effort to stop myself from cheering or groaning. I hadn’t even considered an IFF device, but it was looking like I should install that kind of thing first in all my creations from now on.
“Let her go!” Armsmaster bellowed, making me blink. Had my baby taken someone hostage?
That is unacceptable! My suit had crossed a line, taking someone hostage. But then I took a moment to actually think about it.
The opening in the suit was in the back, and didn’t even open all the way down the legs. Unless it had taken someone very small hostage, or had coaxed someone inside, that was impossible. Then I noticed the red, white, and blue fabric just poking out from the back of the suit’s neck.
My baby kidnapped Miss Militia! Oh god, this was so bad. I was happy that I had made something that could fight on an even footing with Armsmaster, but kidnapping a hero was too far. If they found out it was me, I was in deep shit. I wasn’t sure they’d even consider the fact that this was all a huge accident.
Plus, I was kind of a fan so this was a terrible way to get to know your heroes.
But what to do?
My thoughts were distracted by the sound of engines rumbling. I looked up at the source to see an actual bonafide dragon suit. Oh my god! My suit was toast now, that was for sure. The sacrifice of my baby was worth it if I got to see the actual Dragon in action. Even if it did leave a bad feeling in my stomach.
“Armsmaster.” Dragon said, their voice distorted by a mechanical effect. That was a good idea, I should make a tinker tech mask- “Is Miss Militia still inside the rogue machine?”
“She is.” Armsmaster confirmed as he dodged another drop kick from my suit.
“Confirmed. Switching away from lethal weaponry.”
I laughed to myself a little at that. Dragon had come bearing lethal weaponry first. That was a compliment of the highest order. I just wished that my compliment to them had turned out better.
“Deploying EMP.” Dragon declared, firing a small missile at my suit.
Armsmaster jumped away in time to avoid the shockwave from the missile. There was a moment before he was quickly followed by my suit as it continued its assault.
“That didn’t work.” Armsmaster shouted, using his halberd to ward off attacks. “Why?”
“Potential insulation against such attacks. Possible use of an alternate energy source.”
I sniffed in pride. It was steam powered.There were electrical systems, but everything was sourced from the steam engines. All the EMP did was slow it down.
The blades on Dragon’s suit folded back, leaving their limbs bare. “Engaging.”
Now that there were two heroes ganging up on my suit, they made short work of it. Dragon chased the suit around while Armsmaster set up a trap with his Halberd’s grappling hook. Once hooked, the suit was pulled slowly towards Armsmaster, letting Dragon take point and grapple it.
When Dragon had my suit immobilized, Armsmaster ran up and started tearing away the back of it. The back of Miss Militia quickly became visible and there was soon a hole big enough to pull her out of. Armsmaster counted down with Dragon, who released another EMP burst at the suit in the same moment that he pulled his comrade out from it.
The moment Miss Militia was out of the suit there was a flicker of green and she was holding a shotgun in her hands that she unloaded into the suit. Steam vents were exposed and several moving parts locked up because of the bullets. The suit came to a shuddering halt.
I let out a breath. My baby was dead. I thought a mental prayer and sent Project Number Two away to steam heaven.
Then Miss Militia finished changing her gun and started shooting my dead baby all over again. It fell over and parts went skittering away across the ground. There was a moment of quiet.
“That was unnecessary.” Armsmaster said. “I was planning on studying that.”
“You’re still going to study it.” Miss Militia snapped. “I was trapped in there for too long. Look at my legs!”
I did and winced. There were cuts all over her. That was just cause to prioritise internal cladding in future projects. Sorry Miss Militia.
“Panacea would tell you to stop bothering her with that level of injury.” Armsmaster said dismissively. “Dragon, what can you tell me?”
“This was a very convincing replica of one of my suits. Classification Wyvern MKIV, I believe. It isn’t anywhere near finished, however.”
It is Project Number Two. I thought indignantly. They didn’t hear me.
“Do we know anyone who would copy tinker tech of that level?”
“Just me.” Dragon said, sounding sure. “Perhaps the Simurgh.”
Armsmaster and Miss Militia slumped in resignation when they realised what that meant.
“We have another copy tinker on the loose.” Armsmaster said bitterly. “And a good one at that. Wonderful.”
I felt a gut punch at those words. Was he bitter about little old me? I hadn’t even properly finished Project Number Two. But that could be contrived as a compliment, so I was going to take it as one.
“Dragon, can we rely on you to transport this back to base?” Miss Militia asked.
“You can.” Dragon confirmed, and began gathering the parts that had spilled everywhere. After a few moments they stood and walked up to a building, then knocked.
“I’m going to need a copy of any footage you captured tonight, young man.” Dragon said the moment the door opened.
“Uh…” The boy said, holding a camera in his hands.
Armsmaster and Miss Militia were still on the scene and were moving around to secure the area. It was time for me to leave.
*Splish-Splash*
Even after all that I managed to get home before my dad. I hid the halberd and Project Number Three in my room where Dad wouldn’t see if he just walked in, then hit the sack after grabbing something from the fridge. The next day was spent looking for another spot to make a workshop. I didn’t visit my old one, because the heroes had probably found it and would assume I was hostile.
I wasn’t, but they wouldn’t see that at first. Not after Project Number Two.
The memory made me sigh wistfully.
In the end I settled on a spot closer to the water that was a decent distance away from my previous workshop and moved some stuff there. I would have mucked straight into cleaning, but I wanted to catch the news tonight. I wasn’t sure if the words of the presenter fulfilled a dream fantasy, or my worst nightmares.
“A new tinker has terrorised the city of Brockton Bay, nearly killing a member of the Protectorate by releasing a powerful robot with apparent capture and destroy protocols. Witnesses report that the death of Miss Militia likely would have been unavoidable if not for the intervention of Dragon. This mysterious tinker is also being credited with the explosion that occurred in the shipyard six days before.”
Well, there went any chance of me being a hero.
“The PRT has given this new tinker the designation ‘Ouroboros’ due to their ability to produce powerful replica of other parahuman tinker tech, albeit with a heavy water theme, as well as a loose association with Dragon. A PRT spokesperson was quoted saying ‘We really wanted to name them Leviathan, but the actual Leviathan is responsible for killing millions, so we didn’t do that.'"
W-what? Did they just… did they just use my name in the same sentence as Leviathan? Did they just say that they wanted to name me Leviathan? They can’t do that. People would get the wrong idea!
“A physical description of Ouroboros has not been recorded. If you see any capes with an unfamiliar costume, it's best that you keep your distance until more information comes to light. In other news, the slau-” I shut the TV off. The remote still hadn’t had its batteries replaced, so I had to run up to the TV and push the button myself.
This was so unfair! I found myself running up to my bed and screaming into the pillow while also punching it as hard as I could. Then I was done and stood up to be a reasonable person. But then I wasn’t done and went back to screaming into my pillow, but on the floor this time.
I stayed like that for a while, not even in the mood to jot down any notes for designs.
Dad came home and spent some time downstairs. Then he went to bed.
I wanted to scream into my pillow again, but didn’t.
*Splish-Splash*
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So this was pretty fun, but for the PRT to name her Leviathan in a world where Leviathan is an Endbringer just... didn't make any sense whatsoever. It broke the spell. I suppose that's why it's called crack.
EDIT: The author has changed the PRT's designation for Taylor to Ouroboros, so I withdraw my criticism. Now I can say this was great fun without restraint.
EDIT: The author has changed the PRT's designation for Taylor to Ouroboros, so I withdraw my criticism. Now I can say this was great fun without restraint.
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corndogman5160
Munchkin Extraordinaire
The first snip, and I'm already excited. You did a good thing here.
I think you hit crack, and skipped right on over it to the unholy amalgam that is insomnia and too much caffeine. Not that that's a bad thing, mind. The occasional hallucinations can be entertaining.
Wuh-oh.
I agree, Taylor needs a loonier name.
Sticking with the water themes... or fish...
Bottlenose, Waterpark, Surf, Soaker...
That's all I got for now.
I vote for FISH.
The fearsome copy tinker, the dark side rival of Dragon, the anti-tinker, Fish...
Would had been funny if there alot of Asian themes or components and they called Taylor "Kopii" and assume that she was ABB. Then have her wail in despair how wrong they got her. Then another mess up has her as another tinker this time a possible E88 member. The silliness from the mix up would be a funny theme of "No one gets me."
Make her specialize in nuclear technology and call her Fish-ion.
I agree that Leviathan is really, really not something that would be done as a name for a cape. Something like Cousteau for the marine guy or... Fish... Yeah I like it, the terrible and Mighty Fish. Terror of the ocean. You can even add a captain! Or a doctor... Dr. Fish or Captain Fish...
It would be more ironic on the ABB side if they know the story about the fish that becomes a dragon XD
Wintermoot
People don't think it be like it is, but it do.
Water is cool I guess.
Also, the name is fine.
Idk why people think they can tell you a name is bad and that you should change it then proceed like it’s a foregone conclusion.
Also, the name is fine.
Idk why people think they can tell you a name is bad and that you should change it then proceed like it’s a foregone conclusion.
Rouge Rogue
Words are absurd
Woah. The response to naming Taylor Leviathan really caught some steam. Guess I screwed up, because that wasn't the kind of heat that I wanted.
Executing a ninja edit to rename Leviathan to Ouroboros, 'cause the connotation is kinda similar.
Am I changing Taylor's Cape name, or the sea monster? When I'm done it will be very obvious.
Executing a ninja edit to rename Leviathan to Ouroboros, 'cause the connotation is kinda similar.
Am I changing Taylor's Cape name, or the sea monster? When I'm done it will be very obvious.
I guess it's just a new Cape being given the same name as an Endbringer make it seems like said new Cape is really bad news, like kill on sight bad news
At least that's my take on it.
There we go. Now it feels like a great joke. I love it.
Wintermoot
People don't think it be like it is, but it do.
Which is obviously the point of the author choosing that name.
Taylor apparently has a very powerful tinker ability and things she makes seem to be inexplicably good at wandering off to accidentally cause maximum mayhem.
Taylor is going to try to clear this up but that effort will end with Leviathan has struck again! Is anyone safe from the mad tinker?! Being the headline the next day.
OrdinaryOnigiri
Verified Demon Snack
In all (semi-)seriousness, I was thinking Carp. In Chinese mythology (and Japanese, I think, but don't quote me on that), when a carp managed to swim up a waterfall successfully, they became a dragon, so it would fit the water theme and the "mimics Dragon" bit.
Also the connotations would send Lung into conniptions. That's always fun.
If they really wanted to go with something water or rather fish-based why not go for Bait? She can make copies of other tinkers work that has a heavy water theme. Making it close to the original, but not identical. Of course, that sounds like the name for a particularly unfortunate power, but hey, what are ya gonna do. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Personally, if you had to go with a water+dragon motif, I would have gone with Sea Serpent or similar. Oroboros does not give the image of anything to do with water or dragons, as it is the snake that eats it own tail, the original symbol of infinity.
I mean, yeah this is crack, but Steampunk would have been a better name for Taylor. It gives the impression of "I can do what you can do, but with steam!"
Rouge Rogue
Words are absurd
It was that symbol of infinity I was going for. Since this Taylor has only achieved two pieces of tinker tech at this point, and both of them are copies. Think of the tail as every other tinker, and Taylor is the head.
The other part of it was that I wanted something that felt big. Copying Dragon, kidnapping Miss Militia, and fighting Armsmaster to a standstill with an incomplete suit, is no small matter. The PRT wanted to give the public that this new tinker was dangerous, because from their perspective, they kind of are.
They have no idea that Taylor's just a steam headed girl with no friends.
Anyway, I'm going to go post the next chapter of this thing.
The Stormbringer
Worm Fanfic & Crack Connoisseur
My question: She can do stuff with water, right...? What about fusion? 
Breaking water down into hydrogen and oxygen and then using the hydrogen as fuel for nuclear fusion should be easy, right?
Breaking water down into hydrogen and oxygen and then using the hydrogen as fuel for nuclear fusion should be easy, right?
Chapter 2 - Plip Plop, I Know How To Talk
Rouge Rogue
Words are absurd
For a place called ‘graveyard’, I found myself spending an unorthodox amount of time there. Very few people wandered around, so I wasn’t that worried someone was going to stumble into my workshop. On the other hand, it meant I couldn’t make any friends, but friends weren’t a thing I did anymore, so that was okay.
After the day I found out I was going to be sharing a name with an infinity snake, I had had a bad day of tinkering, a decent day, and another great day where I didn’t make a rogue Dragon suit that wanted to kill Armsmaster. Now things were shaping up for another decent day as I started putting flourish into my parkour across the ships.
“Excuse me.” Someone said, unerringly close.
“Ahh!” I screamed, slipping on the top of a ship, landing on my butt then sliding backwards down the side of it. I caught a glimpse of someone in a costume standing near where I was before I hit the ground and rolled backwards over my shoulder. When I stopped moving I remained motionless in a heap, looking at the sky and groaning.
“Sorry about that, I didn’t mean to scare you.” They said as a visored face leaned into my field of view. I moaned as I recognised the costume as Kid Win’s. They were very tall.
“We were just doing the rounds, making sure Ouroboros wasn’t hanging out around here. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that, would you? If you don’t, that’s fine. This has been a wild goose chase, honestly. I wish it was as easy as building a workshop detector, but there’s so many things about that that wouldn’t add up or would measure in the wrong way. I know. I’ve tried.”
Oh my god a workshop detector was such a snazzy idea. It’s a shame I didn’t have a notebook on me. I made a mental note, then another mental note, and then another, all reminding me to by a small notepad or something that I could carry around.
Three should do it.
God damn muse. Striking at any time.
“Is there something on my face?” Kid Win asked. “You can talk, right? I didn’t make you mute just now? That wouldn’t be good. Please talk.”
“Um…” I realised that I had been staring at him while I was making those mental notes. That had been important, mental notes didn’t stick unless you dedicated enough time to putting them up. The inspiration for a workshop detector was already fading, but the dedication to get me that fucking notepad wasn’t.
Maybe I should get more than one, since notepads tended to fill up so quickly.
Ah! I was doing it again.
“You said um!” Kid Win fist pumped. “That’s good, I didn’t hurt a civilian. Armsmaster would have had my ass if I accidently knocked out a schoolgirl and made her dumb. Please tell me you have more words, though.”
“I don’t think you made me stupid, silly.” I said, then clapped my hands over my mouth. Why had I said that? Was I going back to the chatterbox Taylor of old? I really wished that wasn’t the case, because then all that character development I went through would have been for nothing!
Kid Win, to his credit, laughed in relief. “It’s fine. Let’s get you up.” He shortened dramatically before crouching down and offering me a hand to pull me up. I frowned at his ability to change his height, but accepted the offer. Then I almost fell over in excitement when I saw what he was standing on.
“You’re on a hoverboard!”
“Yeah, I am.” Kid win did a spin to show off. “Built it myself. It only took a few weeks, even. Took apart like, three other projects to get the parts I needed, but it’s been fun being able to keep up with Aegis for the first time since joining up. Flyers, man. They’re hella fast.”
“Can I try?” I gushed.
“Uh.” Kid Win blanched. “No offence, but you might be trying to steal my tech.”
Disappointment wracked my entire being. “Aww…”
“But if you want, I could let you try out my Spark Pistol.”
The disappointment was utterly destroyed by the wave of excitement that washed through me from those words. It must have shown on my face.
“Hold on.” Kid Win said, grinning as he fiddled with the device. “Gotta make sure you can’t turn it on me. Okay, here.” I was handed a red and white pistol complete with a trigger and everything. I turned it over, giddy as I inspected it. There was a magazine cartridge that I expected held a battery instead of bullets, given this thing was called a shock pistol. I looked down the barrel to see what I could see.
“Woah!” Kid Win pushed the gun so it was pointing off to the side. “Never look down the barrel of a gun. Even one that has the safety on. You couldn’t brain yourself with this thing, but I don’t want to find out what happens if it hits someone in the eye from close range.”
I looked at him with what felt like a dumb expression on my face. “Oh my god, you’re totally right. Sorry, bad habit.”
“Uh… That’s a habit?”
I ignored the question and aimed the shock pistol at a random ship then pulled the trigger. A tiny, thin beam of energy crackled out of the weapon and arced towards the metal plate I had ended up aiming at. It left a little black mark with a cute little ‘zap!’ With a whoop of excitement, I rushed over and inspected the mark.
There wasn’t any dent in the metal, it was just discolouration. The gun shot energy, so it shouldn’t have much stopping power anyway. But I wondered how much it would do to a person and the only other person around was Kid Win. I doubted he would appreciate being shot with his own tool, so I pointed it at myself.
“What are you doing? Wait- Stop!” Kid Win shouted.
But I had already pulled the trigger. The bolt hit me in the chest and I felt the energy rush to the ends of my limbs, making me reflexively move into a spread armed position and judder like I’d been tased. It hurt a little, but not much damage had been done and it was over quickly. My shirt had a little black blemish on it now. It was kind of hard to make out given I was wearing black, but I thought it was cool.
“Are you crazy?” Kid Win demanded. “You could have hurt yourself!” He was scolding me, I realised. My good mood vanished and was replaced by that awkward feeling you get when you know you just fucked up.
“I wanted to see what it did to people.” I admitted lamely.
“Then ask! Don’t just turn it on yourself. What if I hadn’t turned the settings down? You could have been toast. I don’t have it up to a setting that makes people into toast most of the time in the first place, but you could have been seriously hurt!”
I looked at my feet like a chastised child. “Do you want it back?” I asked lamely, holding the gun out and letting it hang from my finger by its trigger guard.
The gun was swiped from my hand and I let the arm drop.
“Take care of yourself, seriously.” Kid Win told me as he started fiddling with the shock pistol again. “I’m disabling it so you can’t nick it off of me and start shooting yourself again. Honestly, what’s wrong with you?”
I turned in the direction of the water and didn’t reply.
The moment got awkward before Kid Win found a way to fill the silence. “Sorry, wrong thing to say. Though I gotta ask, why aren’t you at school?”
I looked at the Ward and looked him up and down. “Why aren’t you at school?” I shot back, more out of curiosity than antagonism. “Aren’t Wards supposed to have good grades and stuff?”
“I’m a hero, and yes. I have good grades.” Kid Win said stiffly. “But as a hero I have to look out for the common folk. Or something, something, look after everyone.”
“Ah.” I nodded. “Well then. I walked away from it!” I finished with a flourish.
“You walked away from school?”
More than just walked away from it. I thought. Then I nodded, “Basically, yeah.”
“Why? Were you getting bullied?”
The question reminded me of the terrible trio. Sophia, Madison, and Emma.
I nodded, then shook my head, then kind of did both. “That was part of it. Another part was I didn’t have any friends. Another part was that the school didn’t care about me. Better for me to just leave. I’ve felt great ever since.”
“You still need an education.” Kid Win pointed out.
“You’re right. Maybe I’ll wait a few years before going back and finish up my studies. That way, at least the bullies will be gone.”
“That’s rough. Have you considered switching schools?”
“More times than you can imagine. Like, there was this one time where I was stuffed into a locker and wasn’t let out for hours. That was one of the worst days there. I got detention because I missed all of my classes, even though I got a medical slip from hospital excusing me for the incident.”
“What school did you say you went to?”
“I didn’t, silly. Oh, and another time, my mom’s flute was stolen and broken I think. It was one of the last things I had to remember mom by, then Emma told me she threw it away in the back dumpster, but I think she was lying. I spent several hours sorting through rubbish trying to find it, but it wasn’t there…” I trailed off, still feeling the effect of losing the flute.
“Hey, uh…”
“Oh! And then there was this one time where I spent all night working on a project for english, but one of the trio stole it and put her name on it. I think she used white out on my name, then wrote her’s on top and the teacher didn’t even notice. Then I got detention because I didn’t do my homework. That wasn’t just one time, actually.”
“That sounds rough, uh… I didn’t catch your name.”
“That’s because I didn’t give it, duh.”
“Could I… Could I ask for it?”
“Nope!”
Kid Win, who’s posture had become incredibly awkward over my gushing tyrade, suddenly became awkward and defeated.
“I just want to help.” He said, a little dumbly. Did he feel out of his depth? I might have been a bit too candid there.
“You are helping, silly.” I walked up and flicked him on the forehead, then giggled at his reaction. “It’s been wild, talking to myself all day out here, every day. I’ve been afraid that I was going a bit loopy. But then you showed up and I had my first conversation in a while. It was nice. All the harm I took from this conversation was self inflicted for once, and it kind of felt good.”
Kid Win’s face scrunched up. “I’m not gonna touch that one.”
“Oh, but do touch it with a ten foot pole or something. And yeah, I forgot how relaxing just talking could be. That’s talking to someone, not just speaking out loud without anyone around.” I paused, a thought occurring to me. “Where did that expression come from? The ten foot pole thing.”
“Beats me.” Kid Win shrugged. “Hey, listen citizen. The PRT are on the lookout for Ouroboros. The rogue machine that went wild a few days ago has everyone’s panties in a twist.” I giggled at the term. “We have reason to suspect that their workshop is in the boardwalk, or somewhere nearby, which is why I’m here. Since you spent a lot of time around here, apparently, would you happen to have encountered anything… tinkery?”
I put on a show of thinking. It wasn’t hard because I was actually thinking really hard. They were looking for me, that much was obvious. I totally wasn’t about to direct them to my new workshop, but I wasn’t one hundred percent on sending them towards my old one either. But if I didn’t tell them anything, they might see it as suspicious and investigate me harder. That was something I definitely wanted to avoid.
“Yeah, I think so.” I said carefully.
“Where?” Kid Win asked earnestly, actually drifting towards me on his hoverboard.
“It’s like, far away though. Somewhere over there.” I pointed, using the water to make sure I was pointing in the right direction towards my old workshop. “There were ‘kssssshhhh’ sounds coming out of there so I stayed away. It’d take a bit to get there for me to show you.”
“That’s fine.” Kid Win grinned. “You wanted to try out my hoverboard, right?”
I blinked, registering the question. Then I jumped for joy. “You’ll let me?”
“We’re both going to be riding on it, so if I’m invading your personal space, just let me know and I’ll let you down.”
“You can’t let me down, you have a hoverboard!” I told the silly hero. “And I don’t really have any concept of personal space ever since the locker, which is weird because you’d have thought something like that would have like, given me PTSD flashbacks and claustrophobia with a side of general disgust at everything given the *ahem, biohazardous waste that was everywhere.”
“What was that?”
“Lemme on!” I jumped onto the hoverboard and it immediately started wobbling. Ideas for stabilisers started running through my mind as I grabbed Kid Win and held on tight. From the way he was glancing down, he was having similar thoughts.
I certainly wasn’t enough to get anyone looking down like that.
“So how do we go?” I asked, grabbing Kid Win’s attention using something other than my assets.
“We’re already going.” He told me, with a trace of smugness in his voice. I looked down and squealed excitedly when I realised that we were already fifteen feet off the ground. “Which direction was it?”
“Well… the water is that way, so… that way.” I pointed, and we started moving in that direction.
It was really cool, flying across the ship graveyard.
Kid Win ruined it though. “So your experience at school sounds a lot like a trigger event.”
I frowned, not liking that we were dwelling on it without my volition. “You’d think so.”
“You didn’t trigger?”
“Not in the locker.” I said truthfully. “After, I heard the doctors talking about trigger events like you did just now and looked it up. It definitely fit the conditions, but I just didn’t. Maybe I... can’t?”
Boy, that felt weird. Lying through my teeth like that. At least we were standing so close that Kid Win couldn’t see my face. He was a lot shorter than me, anyway.
He nodded, regardless. “Some people just don’t have the ability to trigger in the first place. You need a something, something in your brain to do it. And only half of the population has that something, something, or something. That’s too bad, you could have had awesome powers.”
“Yeah… too bad.” I said wistfully. “Wait! We passed it!”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“You were trying to get me to divulge my powers.”
“Oh right… sorry. Anyway, I think we already found this workshop a few days ago.”
I slapped Kid Win lightly on the shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me? I wouldn’t have wasted your time.”
“Had to be sure.” Kid Win shrugged as we set down next to the old workshop. “You might have been Ouroboros, but you don’t really match the image of them I had in my head.”
I made sure I was facing away from Kid Win before pouting. Why had they given me that name? Why not ‘Water Dragon’ or something? Then I cleaned my face up and started gushing again.
“Can I go inside? Is it safe?”
“It’s been cleared out, so yeah. And yes to your first question as well.”
“Woohoo! Tinker Workshop!” I celebrated as I rushed inside. As soon as I made it inside I stopped, my enthusiasm drained. All of my stuff was gone. Even the benches I had made by bending the metal walls of the ship had been removed. I was right not to come back here before now.
It kinda made me feel empty inside.
“What’s wrong?” Kid Win asked, joining me.
“I wonder how they feel.” I said. “Ouroboros, I mean.”
“Disappointed, probably. Given that they didn’t manage to finish taking out Miss Militia.” Kid Win shrugged. “Probably a bit bummed out as well, since we found their workshop. I can’t tell you how I would feel if I lost my workshop, it’s under lock and key with the PRT. Though, whenever I find out someone’s been through my stuff and moved things around I get angry. I swear some of them just do it to mess with me. But Ouroboros? Probably seething right now, or this was never meant to be a proper workshop and they’re totally fine with it.”
It was meant to be a proper workshop, and all I felt was grief for Project Number Two.
“Like, the only special thing here is how clean it is.” I said. “I’m going.”
“Hey.” Kid Win grabbed my arm, stopping me. “You didn’t give me your name, but you should have a way of contacting me if you ever need help. What you went through isn’t normal.” He had a small piece of paper in his other hand.
I smiled at him. “Thanks, hero. But that could be a tracking device for all I know.” I pushed the hand with the paper away. “I’m happy as I am.”
“Do you have a cellphone? I could add myself to your contacts.”
I shook my head. “I don’t have a phone.” I could try making a steam powered one though...
“Well…” Kid Win’s mouth twisted as he tried to think up something to say.
“Thanks, Kid Win.” I said, meaning it. “Can you let go of me now?”
“Uh… sure.” He let go.
I considered giving him a kiss on my way out, but decided I wasn’t that blase. So I just flicked him on the forehead and left. “Bye, hero!” I called back before I got too far away.
“Have a nice day… Civilian.” I heard come back at me. Then I vanished into the ship graveyard and took a purposefully meandering route to my new workshop. I had so many ideas for new projects.
NEXT WEEK ON TINKER TAYLOR SUPER SOAKER: Taylor squirts water for the first time. Some villains encroach on the territory of Ouroboros and talk shit. Taylor exists in the same room as her dad.
After the day I found out I was going to be sharing a name with an infinity snake, I had had a bad day of tinkering, a decent day, and another great day where I didn’t make a rogue Dragon suit that wanted to kill Armsmaster. Now things were shaping up for another decent day as I started putting flourish into my parkour across the ships.
“Excuse me.” Someone said, unerringly close.
“Ahh!” I screamed, slipping on the top of a ship, landing on my butt then sliding backwards down the side of it. I caught a glimpse of someone in a costume standing near where I was before I hit the ground and rolled backwards over my shoulder. When I stopped moving I remained motionless in a heap, looking at the sky and groaning.
“Sorry about that, I didn’t mean to scare you.” They said as a visored face leaned into my field of view. I moaned as I recognised the costume as Kid Win’s. They were very tall.
“We were just doing the rounds, making sure Ouroboros wasn’t hanging out around here. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that, would you? If you don’t, that’s fine. This has been a wild goose chase, honestly. I wish it was as easy as building a workshop detector, but there’s so many things about that that wouldn’t add up or would measure in the wrong way. I know. I’ve tried.”
Oh my god a workshop detector was such a snazzy idea. It’s a shame I didn’t have a notebook on me. I made a mental note, then another mental note, and then another, all reminding me to by a small notepad or something that I could carry around.
Three should do it.
God damn muse. Striking at any time.
“Is there something on my face?” Kid Win asked. “You can talk, right? I didn’t make you mute just now? That wouldn’t be good. Please talk.”
“Um…” I realised that I had been staring at him while I was making those mental notes. That had been important, mental notes didn’t stick unless you dedicated enough time to putting them up. The inspiration for a workshop detector was already fading, but the dedication to get me that fucking notepad wasn’t.
Maybe I should get more than one, since notepads tended to fill up so quickly.
Ah! I was doing it again.
“You said um!” Kid Win fist pumped. “That’s good, I didn’t hurt a civilian. Armsmaster would have had my ass if I accidently knocked out a schoolgirl and made her dumb. Please tell me you have more words, though.”
“I don’t think you made me stupid, silly.” I said, then clapped my hands over my mouth. Why had I said that? Was I going back to the chatterbox Taylor of old? I really wished that wasn’t the case, because then all that character development I went through would have been for nothing!
Kid Win, to his credit, laughed in relief. “It’s fine. Let’s get you up.” He shortened dramatically before crouching down and offering me a hand to pull me up. I frowned at his ability to change his height, but accepted the offer. Then I almost fell over in excitement when I saw what he was standing on.
“You’re on a hoverboard!”
“Yeah, I am.” Kid win did a spin to show off. “Built it myself. It only took a few weeks, even. Took apart like, three other projects to get the parts I needed, but it’s been fun being able to keep up with Aegis for the first time since joining up. Flyers, man. They’re hella fast.”
“Can I try?” I gushed.
“Uh.” Kid Win blanched. “No offence, but you might be trying to steal my tech.”
Disappointment wracked my entire being. “Aww…”
“But if you want, I could let you try out my Spark Pistol.”
The disappointment was utterly destroyed by the wave of excitement that washed through me from those words. It must have shown on my face.
“Hold on.” Kid Win said, grinning as he fiddled with the device. “Gotta make sure you can’t turn it on me. Okay, here.” I was handed a red and white pistol complete with a trigger and everything. I turned it over, giddy as I inspected it. There was a magazine cartridge that I expected held a battery instead of bullets, given this thing was called a shock pistol. I looked down the barrel to see what I could see.
“Woah!” Kid Win pushed the gun so it was pointing off to the side. “Never look down the barrel of a gun. Even one that has the safety on. You couldn’t brain yourself with this thing, but I don’t want to find out what happens if it hits someone in the eye from close range.”
I looked at him with what felt like a dumb expression on my face. “Oh my god, you’re totally right. Sorry, bad habit.”
“Uh… That’s a habit?”
I ignored the question and aimed the shock pistol at a random ship then pulled the trigger. A tiny, thin beam of energy crackled out of the weapon and arced towards the metal plate I had ended up aiming at. It left a little black mark with a cute little ‘zap!’ With a whoop of excitement, I rushed over and inspected the mark.
There wasn’t any dent in the metal, it was just discolouration. The gun shot energy, so it shouldn’t have much stopping power anyway. But I wondered how much it would do to a person and the only other person around was Kid Win. I doubted he would appreciate being shot with his own tool, so I pointed it at myself.
“What are you doing? Wait- Stop!” Kid Win shouted.
But I had already pulled the trigger. The bolt hit me in the chest and I felt the energy rush to the ends of my limbs, making me reflexively move into a spread armed position and judder like I’d been tased. It hurt a little, but not much damage had been done and it was over quickly. My shirt had a little black blemish on it now. It was kind of hard to make out given I was wearing black, but I thought it was cool.
“Are you crazy?” Kid Win demanded. “You could have hurt yourself!” He was scolding me, I realised. My good mood vanished and was replaced by that awkward feeling you get when you know you just fucked up.
“I wanted to see what it did to people.” I admitted lamely.
“Then ask! Don’t just turn it on yourself. What if I hadn’t turned the settings down? You could have been toast. I don’t have it up to a setting that makes people into toast most of the time in the first place, but you could have been seriously hurt!”
I looked at my feet like a chastised child. “Do you want it back?” I asked lamely, holding the gun out and letting it hang from my finger by its trigger guard.
The gun was swiped from my hand and I let the arm drop.
“Take care of yourself, seriously.” Kid Win told me as he started fiddling with the shock pistol again. “I’m disabling it so you can’t nick it off of me and start shooting yourself again. Honestly, what’s wrong with you?”
I turned in the direction of the water and didn’t reply.
The moment got awkward before Kid Win found a way to fill the silence. “Sorry, wrong thing to say. Though I gotta ask, why aren’t you at school?”
I looked at the Ward and looked him up and down. “Why aren’t you at school?” I shot back, more out of curiosity than antagonism. “Aren’t Wards supposed to have good grades and stuff?”
“I’m a hero, and yes. I have good grades.” Kid Win said stiffly. “But as a hero I have to look out for the common folk. Or something, something, look after everyone.”
“Ah.” I nodded. “Well then. I walked away from it!” I finished with a flourish.
“You walked away from school?”
More than just walked away from it. I thought. Then I nodded, “Basically, yeah.”
“Why? Were you getting bullied?”
The question reminded me of the terrible trio. Sophia, Madison, and Emma.
I nodded, then shook my head, then kind of did both. “That was part of it. Another part was I didn’t have any friends. Another part was that the school didn’t care about me. Better for me to just leave. I’ve felt great ever since.”
“You still need an education.” Kid Win pointed out.
“You’re right. Maybe I’ll wait a few years before going back and finish up my studies. That way, at least the bullies will be gone.”
“That’s rough. Have you considered switching schools?”
“More times than you can imagine. Like, there was this one time where I was stuffed into a locker and wasn’t let out for hours. That was one of the worst days there. I got detention because I missed all of my classes, even though I got a medical slip from hospital excusing me for the incident.”
“What school did you say you went to?”
“I didn’t, silly. Oh, and another time, my mom’s flute was stolen and broken I think. It was one of the last things I had to remember mom by, then Emma told me she threw it away in the back dumpster, but I think she was lying. I spent several hours sorting through rubbish trying to find it, but it wasn’t there…” I trailed off, still feeling the effect of losing the flute.
“Hey, uh…”
“Oh! And then there was this one time where I spent all night working on a project for english, but one of the trio stole it and put her name on it. I think she used white out on my name, then wrote her’s on top and the teacher didn’t even notice. Then I got detention because I didn’t do my homework. That wasn’t just one time, actually.”
“That sounds rough, uh… I didn’t catch your name.”
“That’s because I didn’t give it, duh.”
“Could I… Could I ask for it?”
“Nope!”
Kid Win, who’s posture had become incredibly awkward over my gushing tyrade, suddenly became awkward and defeated.
“I just want to help.” He said, a little dumbly. Did he feel out of his depth? I might have been a bit too candid there.
“You are helping, silly.” I walked up and flicked him on the forehead, then giggled at his reaction. “It’s been wild, talking to myself all day out here, every day. I’ve been afraid that I was going a bit loopy. But then you showed up and I had my first conversation in a while. It was nice. All the harm I took from this conversation was self inflicted for once, and it kind of felt good.”
Kid Win’s face scrunched up. “I’m not gonna touch that one.”
“Oh, but do touch it with a ten foot pole or something. And yeah, I forgot how relaxing just talking could be. That’s talking to someone, not just speaking out loud without anyone around.” I paused, a thought occurring to me. “Where did that expression come from? The ten foot pole thing.”
“Beats me.” Kid Win shrugged. “Hey, listen citizen. The PRT are on the lookout for Ouroboros. The rogue machine that went wild a few days ago has everyone’s panties in a twist.” I giggled at the term. “We have reason to suspect that their workshop is in the boardwalk, or somewhere nearby, which is why I’m here. Since you spent a lot of time around here, apparently, would you happen to have encountered anything… tinkery?”
I put on a show of thinking. It wasn’t hard because I was actually thinking really hard. They were looking for me, that much was obvious. I totally wasn’t about to direct them to my new workshop, but I wasn’t one hundred percent on sending them towards my old one either. But if I didn’t tell them anything, they might see it as suspicious and investigate me harder. That was something I definitely wanted to avoid.
“Yeah, I think so.” I said carefully.
“Where?” Kid Win asked earnestly, actually drifting towards me on his hoverboard.
“It’s like, far away though. Somewhere over there.” I pointed, using the water to make sure I was pointing in the right direction towards my old workshop. “There were ‘kssssshhhh’ sounds coming out of there so I stayed away. It’d take a bit to get there for me to show you.”
“That’s fine.” Kid Win grinned. “You wanted to try out my hoverboard, right?”
I blinked, registering the question. Then I jumped for joy. “You’ll let me?”
“We’re both going to be riding on it, so if I’m invading your personal space, just let me know and I’ll let you down.”
“You can’t let me down, you have a hoverboard!” I told the silly hero. “And I don’t really have any concept of personal space ever since the locker, which is weird because you’d have thought something like that would have like, given me PTSD flashbacks and claustrophobia with a side of general disgust at everything given the *ahem, biohazardous waste that was everywhere.”
“What was that?”
“Lemme on!” I jumped onto the hoverboard and it immediately started wobbling. Ideas for stabilisers started running through my mind as I grabbed Kid Win and held on tight. From the way he was glancing down, he was having similar thoughts.
I certainly wasn’t enough to get anyone looking down like that.
“So how do we go?” I asked, grabbing Kid Win’s attention using something other than my assets.
“We’re already going.” He told me, with a trace of smugness in his voice. I looked down and squealed excitedly when I realised that we were already fifteen feet off the ground. “Which direction was it?”
“Well… the water is that way, so… that way.” I pointed, and we started moving in that direction.
It was really cool, flying across the ship graveyard.
Kid Win ruined it though. “So your experience at school sounds a lot like a trigger event.”
I frowned, not liking that we were dwelling on it without my volition. “You’d think so.”
“You didn’t trigger?”
“Not in the locker.” I said truthfully. “After, I heard the doctors talking about trigger events like you did just now and looked it up. It definitely fit the conditions, but I just didn’t. Maybe I... can’t?”
Boy, that felt weird. Lying through my teeth like that. At least we were standing so close that Kid Win couldn’t see my face. He was a lot shorter than me, anyway.
He nodded, regardless. “Some people just don’t have the ability to trigger in the first place. You need a something, something in your brain to do it. And only half of the population has that something, something, or something. That’s too bad, you could have had awesome powers.”
“Yeah… too bad.” I said wistfully. “Wait! We passed it!”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“You were trying to get me to divulge my powers.”
“Oh right… sorry. Anyway, I think we already found this workshop a few days ago.”
I slapped Kid Win lightly on the shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me? I wouldn’t have wasted your time.”
“Had to be sure.” Kid Win shrugged as we set down next to the old workshop. “You might have been Ouroboros, but you don’t really match the image of them I had in my head.”
I made sure I was facing away from Kid Win before pouting. Why had they given me that name? Why not ‘Water Dragon’ or something? Then I cleaned my face up and started gushing again.
“Can I go inside? Is it safe?”
“It’s been cleared out, so yeah. And yes to your first question as well.”
“Woohoo! Tinker Workshop!” I celebrated as I rushed inside. As soon as I made it inside I stopped, my enthusiasm drained. All of my stuff was gone. Even the benches I had made by bending the metal walls of the ship had been removed. I was right not to come back here before now.
It kinda made me feel empty inside.
“What’s wrong?” Kid Win asked, joining me.
“I wonder how they feel.” I said. “Ouroboros, I mean.”
“Disappointed, probably. Given that they didn’t manage to finish taking out Miss Militia.” Kid Win shrugged. “Probably a bit bummed out as well, since we found their workshop. I can’t tell you how I would feel if I lost my workshop, it’s under lock and key with the PRT. Though, whenever I find out someone’s been through my stuff and moved things around I get angry. I swear some of them just do it to mess with me. But Ouroboros? Probably seething right now, or this was never meant to be a proper workshop and they’re totally fine with it.”
It was meant to be a proper workshop, and all I felt was grief for Project Number Two.
“Like, the only special thing here is how clean it is.” I said. “I’m going.”
“Hey.” Kid Win grabbed my arm, stopping me. “You didn’t give me your name, but you should have a way of contacting me if you ever need help. What you went through isn’t normal.” He had a small piece of paper in his other hand.
I smiled at him. “Thanks, hero. But that could be a tracking device for all I know.” I pushed the hand with the paper away. “I’m happy as I am.”
“Do you have a cellphone? I could add myself to your contacts.”
I shook my head. “I don’t have a phone.” I could try making a steam powered one though...
“Well…” Kid Win’s mouth twisted as he tried to think up something to say.
“Thanks, Kid Win.” I said, meaning it. “Can you let go of me now?”
“Uh… sure.” He let go.
I considered giving him a kiss on my way out, but decided I wasn’t that blase. So I just flicked him on the forehead and left. “Bye, hero!” I called back before I got too far away.
“Have a nice day… Civilian.” I heard come back at me. Then I vanished into the ship graveyard and took a purposefully meandering route to my new workshop. I had so many ideas for new projects.
*Splish-Splash*
I think I'm going to start doing a preview of subsequent chapters, that seems fun.
NEXT WEEK ON TINKER TAYLOR SUPER SOAKER: Taylor squirts water for the first time. Some villains encroach on the territory of Ouroboros and talk shit. Taylor exists in the same room as her dad.
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